Finding Tasha

Chapter 10 Things Heat Up

A moment or two later the doorbell rang again. She opened the door without thinking. "Did you forget your house key, hon?" Later it would occur to her that it was the first time in months that she opened the door without dreading what was on the other side. Jason stood on the other side, jeans and a t-shirt under the battered jacket she was starting to really love because of how it fit his shoulders. "Get a grip," she thought.

"Hi," he said carefully. "She ran by me saying she was going to Gina's. I don't think she forgot anything," he turned to watch her daughter disappear around the corner at the end of the block. When he turned back he caught her in that intense gaze of his. "Can we talk?"

"I suppose we probably should but I'll warn you I'm feeling embarrassed so I don't really want to."

"There's nothing to be embarrassed about, Tash. He looked her directly in the eyes for once his expression seemed remarkably open. "Can I please come in?"

She stepped back as he entered, one shoulder forward to slip past her. He hesitated, lowering his head bowed a bit as he passed. She caught the scent of sandalwood. She breathed deeply but looked past him as she closed the door.

"I'll take your coat."

"Sure,' he said absently as he pulled the coat from his shoulders. She took it and turned to put it in the closet.

He hadn't moved when she turned and she asked, "Would you like to sit down? Would you like something to drink?"

"No" he said simply. "You look really nice. Sara said your lunch went all afternoon." He stood unmoving in the tight entry, crowding her. She would have to touch him to pass by and she wasn't doing that.

"Thanks" she said as she waited for him to move or talk. "Jase? What do you want?"" and braced herself for the answer.

He surprised her when he reached up and rested his large hand gently against her cheek. "You," he said simply and he looked at her so intensely she almost believed him.

Her temper flared hot. "Oh, for heaven's sake!" She tried to push past him, "What game are you playing? We practically screw on your desk, and you make me feel something again, and I think maybe this thing I'm feeling isn't so one sided, afterall. Then you dress me like some disobedient child and send me home!" She paused for a moment and relished the anger she felt. It felt good to feel angry. She'd tried to stay in control for so long she forgot how good it felt to just react.

"You come back saying something like that! You drive me crazy! I may have only had sex with one man but I was married a long time, I'm not stupid. Are you interested in me or not?!"

"Damn it woman, I made love to you on my desk, I didn't "practically screw" you!" You were a friend's wife one minute and I was saving your financial hide the next. I help you through his death and the next I had you draped over the mahogany desk he bought! I hated that damn desk! I thought it looked self-important." he ranted. "Now I can't get anything on it because I keep seeing you there and I wouldn't part with it now." He pulled his hair again and Tasha felt like pulling his hand down or he wouldn't have any hair left. "I'm trying to do the honorable thing here and not take advantage of you and I'm acting like a teenager." His hands fell to her shoulders and gripping them tightly, he looked directly into her face, his eyes snapping.

"So maybe you can explain to me how the most beautiful woman I've known in ... forever, doesn't know she turns me inside out. And how come it is you went off like a rocket before I even had you naked! I know you were confused but damn it so am I," he finished into the silence. They stood there as the clock ticked, both breathing hard.