blank | taekook

three.

The scene towards the end of this chapter touches on a sensitive subject. Just a warning; I don't want to take any risks. Love you all <3

___

"That was awesome!" Taehyung bubbled, bouncing out of the theatre and slinging an arm around Jungkook's shoulder with a bright smile plastered on his face. The younger flinched at the contact, and Taehyung pulled away. "Oh, sorry," he muttered, returning his arm down to his side.

Jungkook's cheeks flushed lightly in guilt. He didn't want Taehyung to feel bad, or have to adjust the way he acted for Jungkook. "It's fine," he mumbled back, moving closer to Taehyung ever so slightly, but the curly haired man noticed.

He tried again, sliding his arm more tentatively this time around the somewhat fragile boy's figure, and this time, there was no grimace, and in its place was a little smile. A slight satisfaction bloomed in Taehyung's chest; it was a sign of acceptance, despite how small it was.

"I liked the movie," Jungkook remarked lightly as they continued to walk through the pleasant, quiet day. It was cloudy, but somehow it was nice. Taehyung grinned again, and felt the urge to ruffle Jungkook's hair the way he had earlier. "I'm glad," he responded. They walked around slowly, aimlessly for a little while before Taehyung realized he should probably get home so he could grade quizzes.

"Hey, Jungkook?" he spoke reluctantly, and the boy in question turned his head. "I should probably go home," he informed him sadly. "If I don't grade these quizzes soon, I'll be up even later than usual, which is saying something," he added, laughing lightly.

Jungkook nodded, and made himself smile, though he felt a bit disappointed. Taehyung stepped away, removing his arm from its spot around Jungkook's small frame and smiling sadly. "Tomorrow, right?" he asked.

Some of the gloom drifted from the air. "Yeah!" Jungkook squeaked, the smile starting to become real. What was the feeling in his chest? He pressed his lips into a thin line, still curled in happiness, and exhaled slowly.

"Don't miss me too much," Taehyung added with a smug wink.

Despite his heartbeat picking up a bit, some sort of clever part of Jungkook peeked out, and without thinking, he quirked his eyebrows, replying, "I won't."

It was unclear whether it was Taehyung or Jungkook himself that was more shocked at the smooth response, but it brought a surprised laugh out of both of them. "See you tomorrow," Taehyung giggled, waving.

"See you then," Jungkook said back, grinning wide. Finally, they really parted, and the younger of them walked away practically clutching his chest. These feelings were overwhelming him, and part of him liked it, but another part still felt unsure.

He'd never really felt this way towards someone before, not even a family member, so it scared him a little bit. Was this really what it was like to be a real, close friend to someone? Did people really feel this way all the time? How did they cope without melting, the way he felt he might?

His whole life he had believed that he was better off alone. He'd never really ached for anyone, though sometimes the silence became too much for him, and he had to get out of his home for a while. So everything was new to him, and it amazed him that he could feel so attached. After all, they'd only met the previous day. But maybe it was good for him. Maybe he could learn from Taehyung.

He blinked confusedly when he saw the building in front of him. Home.

He waddled in, shuffling quickly all the way to the elevator and shoving himself in. His mind was too awake, he needed to calm himself. He hurried down to the end of the hallway, taking shelter from nothing in particular in his home. Out the large window, he could see that it had begun to rain.

His feet rushed him into his bed, and he shoved his head into his pillow. Nothing was making any sense.

Stop being so dramatic. This shouldn't be affecting you so much. Just calm down. You have no reason to be afraid.

He tried to repeat these things in his head, thinking that maybe if he did so enough, he'd start to believe they were true. But they never went away, and suddenly his heartbeat rocketed, and his breathing became shallow.

Fear shocked through him, and it felt like bricks had been chucked at his chest. This feeling wasn't unfamiliar, but that barely lessened the awful torturous effect it had on him.

A panic attack. He'd had his first at the beginning of his teenage years, and each time he had one, he prayed it would be his last. He shook, whimpering into his pillow and curling into a tight ball. He wished he could just suffocate like this. Time passed, and he did not notice. It began to rain harder, and he did not notice.

Finally, he felt slight relief beginning to flow through him. He laid there, turning his face out of his pillow to face the ceiling, and trying his best to just breathe. It was reaching the time when he would usually eat something, but he couldn't be less hungry.

Fortunately, he didn't have panic attacks very often - maybe twice, three times a year, but this one had seemed even longer than normal.

Eventually, he felt a little better. He turned over in his huge bed exhaustedly, so he was facing the window that almost made up his whole outside wall. It was getting dark, and it had never stopped raining. Had he really been laying here that long?

He briefly wondered if Taehyung had finished grading those quizzes he'd mentioned earlier as he squirmed around, so he was in a position where could pull the covers over himself.

He just felt tired. All he'd really wanted was to be happy that day.

He sighed, realizing he'd be sleeping once again in those same clothes. Oh well. Shutting his eyes, heavy with disappointment, he decided this was where his day ended.

____

Whoa. Okay. Yeah I know. That was a confusing mix of fluffy and depressing, sorry lol. IT'LL BE HAPPIER NEXT CHAPTER PROBABLY MAYBE. Actually I won't promise that. But yeah. Hope that despite that, you enjoyed this chapter. See you soon! c: