I Love You But You Don't

Right Beside You

Right Beside You

© HateshinaiSoraX

From the very start, simula't sapul, alam ko naman na wala na akong lugar sa puso niya e. Well I may have a part in his life but in his LOVE life? I don't think so.

After all, ako yung best friend.

BEST friend or sa tagalog, MATALIK na kaibigan.

Hindi girlfriend...hindi syota...at mas lalo namang hindi ang taong mahal niya.

Pero kahit na ganun, okay lang. Kasi kahit na hindi niya alam ang nararamdaman ko para sa kanya at least nagagawa kong manatili sa tabi niya. Mahirap kaya yung wala ka na ngang chance na maging lover niya tapos hindi mo pa siya makasama at makausap. Yung tipong takaw silip ka lang kapag may chance tapos hindi niya pa kilala kung sino ka? Mas ayoko ng ganun. Okay na sa akin yung nakakausap ko siya, kilala niya ako... at tinatrato niya ako as his friend. Best friend. As well as sister.

A little history about how our friendship had started...

I befriended him in the 3rd grade. Wala lang, classmates--seatmates even. Siyempre kapag magkatabi, kailangan niyong mag-usap. Kahit na sabihin pa nating mahiyain ako at super tahimik ko. Yung tipong mailap ako sa tao at mas gusto ko pang makipag-usap sa hangin kaysa sa isang humihinga't totoong human being, sa huli... kailangan ko pa rin talagang makipag-usap sa katabi ko for the whole year. Ay baka amagin ang bibig ko't pamugaran ito ng mga daga't ipis no. No thank you....sacrifice ko na lang ang pagiging mahiyain ko kaysa mabulok ang laway ko sa kakakatahimik. Also, remaining quiet and angelic during those times actually proved quite a hard feat lalo na't siya yung tao na total opposite ko halos ang characteristic.

Friendly, chatterbox, makulit, maligalig, hindi mapakali, parang palaging nakalunok ng isandamakmak na energy vitamins at pinaulanan ng asukal ang buong sulok ng lalamunan at katawan... that's Mark. Class clown, pero at the same time, THE class genius.

He always try to make me laugh, make me talk and make me feel comfortable during those times na mag-seatmate kami and eventually I managed to warm up to him. He managed to break through my walls of steel and before we know it, we're friends.

FRIENDS pa lang. Hindi pa super duper close. Hindi pa super duper na hindi mapaghiwalay.

It was on our graduation when we became more than friends---and turned to BEST friends.

I almost failed on one of my subjects at that time kasi. Not because I flunk my test, nor fail to pass any requirements. Actually totally complete ako sa mga 'yon at pasado ang tests ko. The reason why I almost failed one of my subjects is because someone actually framed me of cheating in our final exams and well, told our teacher that I had copied her project ideas and the like.

Eto namang si teacher, uto-uto at naniwala naman agad. Pinagdudahan talaga niya ako at kinwestyon agad. Ang masama pa dito, kahit na anong explain ko, hinding-hindi niya ako pinapakinggan. Binalaan niya pa ako na kapag hindi ako nakapagpakita ng pruweba na hindi ko kinopya yung mga bagay-bagay ng atribida kong kaklase, ibabagsak niya ako.

Ako naman, etong umiyak ng umiyak ng lumabas ako ng faculty ni uto-utong teacher. On my way on finding a quiet sanctuary in the school (after-school na rin kasi noon at wala--or iilan na lang ang tao sa campus), suddenly bumped into someone. And eventually it turned out to be Mark.

He immediately questioned me as to why I'm crying. May nang-api daw ba sa akin. Sino daw yung nakipag-break sa akin at babangasan niya. As he said those things mas naiyak lang ako. Hindi ko kasi siya classmate during that time pero natuwa ako kasi kahit na nalimitahan na lang yung pagkikita namin, kahit papaano tanda niya pa ako. At kinikilala niya pa rin ako as his friend.