One of a Kind

Chapter 6

      The uncomfortable growing silence was becoming louder by the minute. I gazed into her eyes wondering if she was actually serious. By the uncertainty that composed her face and by the hope in her whisper, I could tell that she meant it. The silence between us was booming now, so I opened my mouth to giver her my answer. Just before the acceptance spilled out of my gaping mouth with delight, tears began cascading down my cheeks. I had a strange feeling, one I've never felt before. I sat there in front of her with my mouth ajar and a river flowing from my eyes racking my brain, grasping at anything that could explain my strange reaction, when I realization hit me. I was finally wanted.

   That uncertain expression Castella wore quickly morphed into worry when my inexplicable breakdown occured. "Yes," I whispered, trying to control my hysteria. Her brown eyes stared at me with suprise.

      "Kathryn, why are you crying?"

    I couldn't control my hysteria any longer - as if it were under control in the first place, "It... It..." I sobbed helplessly. "I. . . I wish I could tell you."

      "You can. We're family now, you can tell me anything," Castella tried to sooth me.

      "I just can't. . . you wouldn't und. . . und. . . understand," I finally sput out. 

    "Try me." She calmly begged.

      "You don't get it, Castella!" I screamed, "I can't tell you! I can't tell ANYONE!" I broke into sobbs again.

      "Fine, tell me when you're ready," Castella calmly answered, but I could tell that she was frustrated. Why shouldn't she be? I just blew up in her face after she saved me and invited me into her family. I'm awful. But how could I tell her? There was no way I could reveal my past; my true identity to her, just no way. I didn't want to lie though. I was tired of lying. My life was a lie, Castella already though my name was Kathryn. If i kept lying, the only friendship I've ever had would shatter. Everything in me told me to leacve; to not get attached, but I had to stay. Becoming a gypsy might be the only way to keep my old life in the past. The only way to keep all the people I grew up with safe, the only way to keep my village safe. . . from me.

       I frowned to myself. I didn't want to hurt Castella, but I couldn't hurt my people. I was completely torn. Wait, I'll just block all the conversations that lead to my past. Then I won't be lying to Castella. I'm brilliant! I grinned at my master plan. This plan is bound to blow up in my face, but it'll buy me some time.

        When I came back from my thoughts, Castella was gazing into the danceing fire. "Castella," I paused to make sure she was listening. 

         "Mmm. . ." She murmured, still intently staring at the blazing fire.

      "I didn't mean to offend you," I craoked, my voice still groggy from wailing uncontrollably. "I can't tell you, because I promised."

        "Who," she causually asked still mesmorized by the fire.

     "I promised myself that I wouldn't speak a word of it to anyone." Castella sat up suddenly, making me jump back.

        "Why?" She exclaimed with a fire of her own blazing in her eyes. "What is so important that it has to kept locked up? Especially from me, I'm your family. What is so horrible that you'd keep it from your family?" Castella hissed. I really cut her deep. I couldn't believe how much she trusted me and how openly she accepted me with only knowing me for a few hours."Do you not trust me? Do you not trust me because of who I am and where I come from? You're just like everyone else aren't you?"

       "No," I gasped, "I trust you. I mean you saved my life and you've offered me a new one. This secret is why I'm on my own. You have to believe me when I say that I will tell you, but only when the time is right. Right now I need to keep this to myself."

        "Fine," she mummbled. She was obviously hurt. I felt horrible. I really did want to tell her that I ran away from home because I was supposedly going to betray everyone in my village the moment I turned eighteen. But I couldn't. I glanced over at the near-by fire. It twisted and blarred and licked the heavens, but it was cold.

        Freezing.