Weak When Your Around.

Dirty Laundry.

Kylie's POV:

It was about 5 a.m. When I woke up from another horrible nightmare. They've been happening more often now and I don't know why. I sighed and pushed pieces of damp hair out of my eyes and sat up. I looked around my messy room and just wait until Charlie woke up, which would be soon most likely. Charlie is my little 4 year old brother who stays with me. My mother was terminally ill and eventually ended up passing away. Which left us to struggle by ourselves. It's just me and him in the big world where I can hardly pay the rent and bills each month. Money is tight, times are hard, but we're slowly making it.

     "Kylie!" I heard a soft voice call from the next room over and I immediately stood up and walked over. Charlie was sitting up in his bed rubbing his big brown eyes. I smiled at how his hazel hair was a mess on his head,
   "Goodmorning Charlie, did you sleep well?" I murmured while picking him up in my thin arms.
"Yes but I heard you crying last night." His cute little voice said very concerned, "Why were you crying Kylie?" He poked my cheeks where there were some dried tears with a pout on his lips. I gulped alittle but gave him a fake smile and told him,
    "I just miss mommy that's all."
  He wrapped his small arms around me to give me a hug as I started to take him to the kitchen. I set down at the kitchen table and started to make him breakfast. I noticed he turned on the TV to his favorite shows. I smiled at that and set a plate of eggs and toast with a sippy cup of orange juice in front of him.

"Thank you KyKy!" he smiled and gave me a hug. I just watched him eat for a while until he looked up at me with a mouth full of food, "Why are you not eating?" I smiled at him and shook my head at him though on the inside I was already starting to feel tired and worn out, like a car ruining out of gas and the day just started.
     I sighed as I looked at Charlie, he looks so happy. He didn't understand what was going on. He knew about mom but was too little to really understand the hole we were in.
I squatted down in Charlie as he look to me with a mouth full of toast,
    "Hey Charlie, Kylie wants to walk outside to get some air okay?" He nodded widely, "Now DO NOT move from this chair for any reason and most importantly, do not let strangers in the house. Stay watching TV for a bit, deal?" He nodded again and I gave him a hug and a small kiss on the cheek.
     I walked outside of the apartment complex and sat in the grass yard in front of it. I pulled my knees up to my chest and sucked in a sharp breath. I closed my eyes letting a few tears escape my eye. It's so hard to go on but I know I can't give up. I can't leave Charlie behind all by himself. I just want him to grow up happy and if that means I have to suffer through this life I'd do it. That kid is all I have left and I would do anything for him.
    And I am doing anything and everything for him.
  It's been 2 years since my mother passed, and 1 year with Connor. The man of my nightmares.
      I spent a whole year with it just being Charlie and I, all we had was a one room apartment that I barely afforded with my coffee shop job. It was no way to live, we barely did. Food was so scares back then, both of us were so sickly we would have never survived like that. So one night, as I was walking home with Charlie, a man saw our struggle. At that time, he was the sweetest man you could meet. Nothing but kind all the time. So in time, we ended up dating and he supported Char and I. We were able to live like normal people again. We could actually not have to stress as much about money and if we have food on the table each night. Money was still tight but no where near how it was. Most of all, we all were happy.
   But something changed. Connor had lost is job which he loved dearly. From that the stress became crazy. We still had a decent amount of money but we couldn't let that go. He became stressed and frustrated as he couldn't find another job, he grew angry. And he would let out that anger on me. The abuse became frequent. Our relationship became loveless. And he became careless. Night after night, he would go out and drink and drink or do whatever drug he could find. It all went down hill, leaving us here now.
I felt tears slowly trickle down my cheeks as I thought about it more. Things would be so much easier if my mom was still around. She was the best mother someone could have asked for. She loved me and Charlie so much and would never let anything bad happen to us. Never let us be here.
     I had to push all these thoughts away so that way I could calm down. I needed to get back inside with Charlie before he tried to do anything. As my last few tears fell, I saw man with black hair and pale skin covered in tattoos coming my way. His green eyes were wide with worry as he was now next to me. I felt myself getting nervous as my breath started to speed up. What was he trying to do?
    "Hey, are you alright ? You don't look too good..." His voice flowed out like silk as he crouched down next to me. I gulped as I tried to wipe my watery eyes,
    "I-I'm okay. Thank y-you." I sniffled.
   "You don't look ok, did something happen like, do you need help?" He seemed really concerned. I shook my head,
    "No really I'm ok. I'm sorry for wasting your time." I mumbled pathetically. I didn't think someone could actually care about me... What am I saying? Clearly he is just trying to be a good person. He doesn't care about me. No one will ever care about me.
     "Your not wasting my time. I just was worried seeing a beautiful girl crying in the cold." He gave me a small cheeky smile. I tried to pull on a fake smile but I'm sure he could tell it was fake.
    "Listen, I'm sorry for taking up your morning. I think I'm going to go inside now, you can get on with your day." I said as I awkwardly stood up. He stood up aswell while saying,
      "You didn't take up my morning at all. I like talking to you." He smiled again. His smile really was beautiful. I felt a small blush creep onto cheeks as I awkwardly ran a hand through my hair,
     "I have to get back upstairs to my little brother, maybe we could talk for a little longer there?" I let out a nervous laugh. Oh my gosh what am I doing?! I'm making a mistake, I'm already so clingy. This poor guy probably just feels bad for me and that's the only reason he talks to me. And what was I thinking!? If Connor came home I would be dead!
    "I'd love to" He let out a chuckle that broke me from my thoughts. Maybe it's just time to try to make my life a little better, starting by making some friends. Maybe this is okay.
"So you have a little brother?" He tried to make conversation as we walked up to my apartment.
     "Yeah, his name's  Charlie. He just turned four."
    "Cool" he nodded, "So what's you name?"
   "Kylie. And yourself?"
"Mat, but some people call me Blackbear, it's my stage name." He smiled. "Stagename? Sounds fancy" I softly laughed. "I just rap, nothing too fancy." He chuckled as I opened the door to the apartment.
      I saw Charlie look over, still just where I left him before until he ran over to me. I smiled widely as I picked him, throwing him into my arms.
    "You're such a good kid!" I excliamed and kissed his cheek. He smiled and nodded making Mat and I laugh. He looked over at Mat and very seriously said,
    "Oh no mister, I'm sorry Ky said no strangers in the house." We laughed yet again,
   "He's my guest Char. Its okay" I chuckled.
    "If you say so!" He looked back at me and noticed my face. He put his small hands on my cheeks,
   "Kylie you're eyes are all puffy!" I shook my head at him and tried to get him to stop. "Did you miss mommy again?" It was sweet of him but now uncomfortable, I could only hope that Mat didn't hear. I bit my lip nervously and set Charlie down, "Just go play with you toys." I whispered as he ran off to his room. I turned to look at Mat who seemed confused.
   "I-I'm sorry..." I mumbled as I started to feel uncomfortable beneath his gaze. I could already tell he was going to ask.
   "Why did Charlie ask if you missed your mom?" His voice already sounded soft and sympathetic like he already knew the answer. I motioned for him to follow me to the couch. When we sat down, I cleared my throat,
   "She uh, she passed away three years ago from cancer. That's why its just me and Charlie." I stopped myself before I could say anything else. What am I doing? Why am I telling him this? I'm so stupid- what am I thinking? That he actually cares. I could already hear Connor's voice in my head, spitting the words 'No one will ever care about you'.
   Suddenly I felt myself being pulled into a comforting hug. I was shocked at first and nearly pulled away but I let myself softly cuddle into his embrace.
    "It's okay if you want to let it out. I don't blame you, I'd be devistated if I lost my mom." He said softly as he rubbed small circles on my back. I wish I could let it all out but he's already seen me cry once today and if I cry again I'd look too weak.
     "It's just hard..." I whispered as I almost broke down but had to hold myself together.
    "I'd imagine...if there is anything I can do to help let me know." I looked up to see him giving me a reasuring smile. I gently brought my arms to wrap around him to hug him.
    "Thank you. And thank you for not running away screaming after seeing all this." I softly laughed which made him laugh too. We pulled back from the hug as Mat said, "Its absolutely no problem Kylie. You seem like an amazing person and I want to hang out with you more." I grinned, feeling a blush creep onto my cheeks.
     "Hey if your up for it, maybe later we could go to a park or something so we can all chill" He offered.
   "I'll have to see if we can, it sounds fun. Thank you" I smiled.
   "Just text me your decision?" He grinned as he handed me his phone to put in my number. I nodded as we stood up. He gave me a short hug,
    "See you then," He sang out.
  "Maybe!" I mused as I walked him to the door. He waved with a big smile as he left. And for the first time in a while, my smile felt real. I felt almost happy.

Hopefully it can stay this way

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A/N:
SORRY if this stinks I'm trying tho, hopefully this is better then my original first chapter, and hopefully people are reading this
Xoxo.