the year we spent together ↠ [REWRITING]

Prologue

note before reading - I am currently in the process of rewriting this entire book. It's been a very lengthy process and it is a long ways away from the finishing point. If you choose to stick with the book, please be patient with the slow updates.

I hope you enjoy

xoxo selah

[ prologue ]

I was like any other girl, my dreams and wishes all the same. I wanted to grow up and go to the college I had always desired to go to, and meet the man I would eventually marry and have several children with, all of whom I already picked out names for. I had hoped I would live in an adorable house that I had dreamed for, living out my days with my family. Very simply - I wanted to grow up.

But yet, I knew that would never happen.

At the age of nine I was diagnosed with cancer. People tended to tell me that I would be better in no time, or that I was strong enough to get through it. But five years later, being in and out of remission, never fully being recovered, I never got better.

Overtime, I accepted that I might not be in the clear. My parents however, haven't. When I was younger, they constantly were looking for different hospitals. They thought that if they could find new doctors, they could do something more. They wanted to believe that they could pay anything away, my sickness was a reality check for them. No matter how much they spent on me, in the end they couldn't heal me through cash and checks. 

At the hospitals I was admitted into, I had seen people come and go and yet I always stayed with barely any change. At some moments of my life, I wish everything could just end in someway, if that meant me getting better or if it meant me dying, I wanted to stop with the hospital visits and the medicine and the constant state of fear of what was going to happen next.

As the years progressed, things got worse. Hope of the life I once wished to have diminished. Family and friends came around less and less often and I found myself sleeping the days and weeks away. My childhood stripped away from all the pain, it registered I might never get the chance to actually live. The plans and ambition I formerly had to get me through the long periods of distressing time alone were leaving me.

I was trapped in a hell of constant fear, never knowing if it was my last year on this earth or if I would somehow be granted another. It wasn't until I met him that I realized all of the pain and suffering that came with living the life I was forced to live could actually be worth fighting for.

And oh how I fought.