The Dangerfields

Chapter Eleven

I eventually stop crying, and become silent.

Ryder breaks the silence as he clears his throat. "What was that? What happened to you?" He asks, concerned.

"I-I don't know," I say shakily, "It was like a vision, but it was a memory. It sucked me in, and made me relive it. I had to watch them die again." Another tear slips out, to join the rest.

"So that's your curse," Mom says quietly, "I had been wondering what it would be."

My eyes fly open, and I stare at her in shock. "You knew that something like this would happen to me?"

"No, I had no idea what it would be. I didn't want you to worry about it, so I didn't tell you. Every Temerary has a curse, and I guess yours is memories.

"We have curses because nature is off-balance. We have the upper-hand in everything, because we have our powers. The curses seem to be an attempt to even out the balance between the Temerarys and Normals. The curses come to us when we are fifteen, old enough to handle them.

"Ryder's is isolation. That's why he has to go away to be alone. It took us awhile to figure it out the first time, we couldn't figure out why he was so aggravated and tense. It's the curse making him be like that. Making him go out of his mind." Ryder winces a bit at her blunt synopsis.

"What about you?" I ask, urging Mom to continue.

"Mine is pain. Every time I use magic, it hurts. It's like..." She closes her eyes as she searches for a way to describe it, "It's like a burning feeling, throughout my entire body. For small spells, like intensified senses, it is more of an ache, but when I use larger spells, like healing a broken bone, I feel as though I am burning alive."

I shudder at her description. I used to wonder why Mom didn't use magic as much as the rest of us, and why she didn't help Grandpa teach us magic. Now I understand. "What about Grandpa?" I ask.

"He had the curse of obedience. Whatever he was told to do, he had to do it, no matter how bad it was. He had no choice. That's why he used to work at the library, because few people would force him to do something there."

My eyes grow wide. That's why he stopped when the government told him to. That's what Mom meant when she said he had no choice. That's why he ran when I told him to, even though it cost him his life.

If only I could do it over again.

I see Ryder glance at Mom, as if wondering if she will continue, but she is silent.

After a moment, we start moving again. If we don't, we will be caught, and it will all be over.

A day later, I sit in the hotel room on the second-top floor, staring out the window. The view isn't great, mostly just the sides of the taller buildings nearby us. Between them, I can only see more shorter buildings, and everything seems isolated.

We've decided to take a risk and stay a second night in this hotel, mainly to stay off the streets for awhile. We haven't left the hotel since we checked in yesterday. It hasn't given us much to do.

Mom talked about ancient artifacts for awhile, because she worked as a tour guide at the history museum before we went on the run. But the museum only held so many stories, and after a bit, we lapsed back into silence.

I've had lots of time to think and re-think what I could've done to save Grandpa and Liv. It's driving me crazy, and I'm at the point where I could scream. I've cried and shed countless tears over their deaths, but it still brings me pain.

If Liv was here she would probably tell me to get over it and move on. I admit, I'm getting better. I've allowed myself to think of them, and think of the time we spent together. It sometimes leads to more tears, but it's progress. Moving on is hard to do.

Their big personalities filled every room, and now it feels empty without them. I feel weaker, less brave without them backing me up. Most of all, I feel small and alone.

I am now looking upon the largest city in the country, with thousands of people within one kilometer of me, but I have never felt so lonely.

I crack one eye open and stare at the clock. 6:48. Early enough that I should go back to sleep. But I won't. I don't deserve sleep, not after what I've done. I slowly crawl out of bed and change into jeans and an orange t-shirt.

I should have saved them, I should have sacrificed myself, I should have done a lot of things, but it's too late now, and all I can do is think about what I could've done to help.

Tears well in my eyes and start streaming down my face. I make a quick decision and grab my blue sweater, throwing it over my head to protect me from the coolness of the November morning.

I put my hood over my face so people won't see who I am, and quietly leave the hotel. The tears keep coming as I walk down the sidewalk towards the edge of the city. I speed up, hoping to forget the pain in my heart. It follows me though, and I start to run, trying to get away.

A sob escapes me, and I slap one hand over my mouth as I fight to control my emotions. But it's too late for that, and I give up, letting my hand fall back to my side as I continue sprinting through the city in the light of the rising sun.

It's becoming difficult to see through the tears, and I almost run into a shopkeeper opening a variety store. "Sorry!" I call over my shoulder, and keep running.

My heart is pounding hard within my chest, and my feet move quickly over the sidewalk as I run. I feel eyes watching me, but I don't bother to look, because I doubt I will see anyone. Anyways, my gaze would probably be drawn to a girl sprinting down the street in the early morning too.

I can see the edge of the city now, drawing nearer in the glow of the dawn. The sun is rising behind me as I run out of the city and into the countryside. My Converse make little noise as I run in the damp grass, wet from the morning dew.

There is a small area of forest ahead of me, and I head towards it, longing for a sense of home. Once I'm there, I gasp for breath as I slow to a stop. My sobs are put on hold as I try to get oxygen into my system, but the tears continue to fall.

After a few minutes, I have regained my breath, but I stifle my sobs, trying not to let them loose. But I can't take this pain anymore, and I can't stand pretending they didn't affect me. This will stop now.

As one last tear rolls down my cheek, glistening in the early light of dawn, I pull out the knife.

A/N: Thank you so much to everyone who has taken the time to read my book! Your reads, comments, votes and support has made me so happy! It really means a lot to a new writer like me. :)

Please vote and comment!

I'd love to hear what you think!

-ForeveraNerd17