I love you, 바보...

On Break

Jamie
Time goes by through to December, and Kevin invites me home with him. I decline his offer. "Why not?"
"I hang out at my old pal's place. I need to see his younger sisters, bet they'll be missing me. And anyway, they could do with a little help around the house with all the snow."
"Aw come on, Jay, we've got rice every night! And every so often, veg soup." I don't respond except for a heavy sigh. "You alright?"
"I'm fine. I just miss my parents a bit. I haven't had anyone to speak Cantonese to since..."
"I know." By now he has formulated a particular way of negotiating the topic, which crops up from time to time.
"Who knows if I'm going to remember?"
"It's alright, they understand."
"You've told them?"
"Yeah. Even if I didn't, well, who would be surprised? Everyone knows you have to keep practising to keep it up. I was in Germany for a month on exchange, came back, and I spent an hour and a half stuttering my way through recounting my trip."
"How's your German?"
"Shit," he blurts.
"Wait... so you're telling me that you got sent all the way to Germany for a month costing who knows how much, and your German is still just shit?"
"Well I can swear in German."
"So can I. It's called Markus Zusak." 100% recommend this to any history nerds, though probably not students of the German language.
"Yes, The Book Thief, set in Nazi Germany, 1939 through to the end of the war. Liesel learns to read from her cigarette smoking, accordion playing, foster father who keeps Jewish amateur boxers in his basement."
"And a foster mother whose favourite word is-"
"Saumensch!"
"Ah, but Rudy Steiner, poor boy, that's a classic example of the friend zone."
"What's worse than a boy who hates you? A boy who loves you."
"I've got a whole bunch of songs I like. If you want I'll send them to your phone and you can listen to them."
"Sure."
"Jamie's got a boyfriend! Jamie's got a boyfriend!" Safaa sang.
"Bloody hell, he's just a friend!"
"Yeah," she smiled at me evilly. "Just a friend."
"Don't take it to heart, little sister," her eldest sister Doniya assures me. "It happens to everyone."
"I try, Doni. I try. But even if I like him, he wouldn't like me of all people. Not like that."
"You like him?"
"Shut up, Safaa. No shit like that. Yes, he offered to bring me over to his place, but I declined. And anyway, if it wasn't going to be Safaa, it was going to be his sister. She's a few years older than Safaa, but who doesn't like teasing their older sibling when they bring home someone like this?"

"Jamie dear, what has Safaa been up to now?"
"I was just texting my friend who's from Leeds. Turns out they have a few more Chinese over there," I explain. Aunty nods in understanding. "And this little monster, she's been at it non-stop. Yes he's a boy and he also plays alto saxophone and in fact sits next to me in band when we rehearse, yes, he's also Cantonese. Yes, we get along awfully well but no, we could never happen like that." My next port of call was Zeddy's room where he would be found, sleeping rolled up like a sushi. "Sushi boy!" no response. "Yah, Zain hyung." I hate calling him the gender appropriate oppa, that's what Kimmy calls Dong Hoon and I'm uncomfortable with it. Neither of them actually understand why. Clearly, it's because there are optional snogging connotations and this one's always been off limits in that respect.
"Hm? Ah, I see you're back."
"Yes I'm back."
"Are you going to visit this Kevin you rave about?"
"Not these holidays. His sister will get carried away like yours did."
"Who? Safaa?"
"Yeah. I was hoping it wouldn't be like that. But his sister knows much more about my friendship with him and there's no way she's not going to think things."
"You don't like him, do you?" No, no Zain, I don't.

We return to school in the new year. The Chinese new year falls on a Sunday this year, thank whoever invented this calendar that no one in our generation of the diaspora know when it actually happens. I can go to The Hole to New Year's bow for James, the Korean sort because the Chinese one has mostly died out. I hop on the end after Kimmy, and usually try extremely hard to not fall over in the process of replicating. They poke fun at my lack of coordination and almost habit of appearing to simply keel over. After that I'm catching the train to Leeds and hang out at Kevin's house.

Even before I leave the platform I get the text from Kevin giving directions to his house. I dial his number and call him. "Hey Kev, d'you want anything from the shops? I'm on my way here right now."
"Nah, it's fine, it's fine."
"I hang out with Koreans a lot. They put emphasis on first impressions and I want to have a good one with my friend's parents you know. Seriously. Some biscuits? Or if there's a Chinese grocer around I'll get something there. Heck, are there any around here? There's one in Bradford but it's the other side of town and I never learnt to drive."
"Just biscuits will be fine, really."
"Alright then."