Find A Way

Day 2: Sam

Ever since I was a little kid, I couldn't wait to move out. We constantly lived in a house that was too small, and my brother and I would be stuck sharing a room, even though there was a seven year age gap between us. His Bob Marley posters looked weird next to my Tonka trucks. I didn't get my own space until I was fourteen, when Cole was finally old enough for the police academy. Even then, it was more like a shoebox than a room of my own. But now that I've moved out and have my own place, I still felt crowded. It was always packed with people I hardly knew, and it was noisy. Felicia had her music on way too loud, and it wasn't even good music, and I could hear Paul's computer games through the paper-thin walls. I wanted my own space; this wasn't exactly what I had in mind though.
It was four in the morning according to my phone. The loud music and video game noises were replaced with snoring, and the insomnia still had me by the balls. I was tired; really, truly, fucking tired. And my eyelids felt like they weighed more than what I benched at the gym. But no matter how hard I tried, I couldn't fall asleep. My eyes stung and I continued to stare up at the popcorn ceiling. I hadn't moved in hours, not since Lainey and Adrienne left. Lainey went home a little after 11 and Adrienne only stayed long enough to get the beer out of her system; she was probably gone by 1 am, but I wasn't paying attention. I stopped paying attention after Lainey left and Adrienne continued to put some more work into the "legal adults to bars in Covington" ratio. By then, my roommate Felicia was sneaking out some boy and had to discuss her life with Adrienne, like there was a slim chance that Adrienne could help Felicia out of whatever fucked up situation she was in that day. That happened a lot. I never wanted to have a part of it, so I disappeared to my room. And stared at the ceiling for three hours. And I still wasn't asleep.

I thought about just not sleeping that night - I could've stayed awake until the next night with ease - but with all my luck, Lainey and Adrienne would've wanted to do something after night swimming and I would've been exhausted. I sat up, groaned, and thought about calling Lainey, but I knew she'd be asleep. She had work in a few hours. So I texted Adrienne instead. Awake for work yet? I asked. Adrienne worked at a nursing facility down the street. Sometimes, she was up before the sun.

Her response came back quickly. Yep. Just got up. Shower time! Gimme 10 minutes.

I replied with just a "K" before flopping back down on the bed. Even though Lainey had to still be asleep, I decided to text her anyway: Love you. Have a good day at work today! It didn't surprise me when there was no response. Lainey didn't wake up for work until 6:30 or so.

With nothing else to do, I kept staring. At the ceiling. At the walls. Out the window. Ten minutes to Adrienne meant something different. She didn't text back until just after 5 o'clock. Sorry, had to get ready. Gotta go find breakfast. Whatchu doing up? she asked.

Can't sleep, I replied. Nothing else.

Can I call you? About to get in the car. You know how I feel about texting and driving. She didn't wait for my reply. Instead, my phone was ringing moments later. She also didn't wait for me to say hello before she started talking. "I don't know if I should get a scone or a muffin for breakfast. They both sound good, but I'd probably feel fat if I got both," Adrienne announced.

"Uh, what's the difference? They're both breakfast right?" I asked. I really didn't know what a scone even was. I knew what a muffin was though, and muffins were awesome. "What the fuck is a scone anyway?" I added when Adrienne didn't reply.

"It's like a..." she paused for a minute, surely trying to dumb down whatever it was she was going to say, "It's like an English biscuit."

I made a face she couldn't see. "Why would you eat a biscuit for breakfast? Unless it's like a breakfast sandwich. Does it have sausage and egg in it?"

"Because it's made for breakfast, dumbass, and no, it does not have sausage and egg in it. It's not a sandwich," she groaned, "Just for that, I'm getting a scone. Hold on, I'm going through the Cappuccino Chaos drive-thru." There weren't any background noises for a few minutes, but then there was another voice through the speaker at the drive-thru. I tried to focus on her voice as she ordered a large blended caramel Frappuccino, no whipped cream, and two blueberry scones, but instead, I just stared out the window. At the different colors in the sky as they were barely visible behind the mountains. Adrienne's voice hit me all at once. "Still there?" she asked.

"Yep," I replied.

"Can I tell you something?" Behind her voice, the radio was on low. I recognized the song, but I couldn't think of what it was called. I just knew it was one that Lainey always listened to.

"Yep," I repeated.

The music ceased and Adrienne said in a matter-of-fact tone, "You know, she wants you to move in with her."

I didn't say anything for a second. "Lainey?" I finally managed.

Adrienne heaved a sigh, but I wasn't sure why she was annoyed with me. "Yes, Alaina. Are you a dumbass?" she shot back, her voice frustrated

The laugh escaped my lips before I could even stop it. "Shut up. It's five in the morning," I used as my excuse. "Did she really say something about us living together?" I thought about how awesome it would be to live with Lainey; to wake up next to her in the morning. I thought of some other scenarios, but they weren't exactly rated-G. Lainey was everything in my book: beautiful, funny, smart. It was a surprise to me when she decided she liked me in the same way that I liked - no, loved - her.

"Yeah, she's been talking about it a lot lately," Adrienne said. She paused to chew what I only assumed was one of her scones, and swallowed loudly. "She just doesn't know how to ask you yet or if you'd even want to live with her, even though I have told her a million times that you will probably pee your pants in excitement the moment she even mentions it. Besides, she knows you can't move in until your lease is up in January."

I made it seem like it was no big deal to me, but it was really the only thought in my head. "Cool," I said with a level tone.

"Yeah." The radio was back on in the background, girly bouncy music playing. It was the kind of music that I hated, but Lainey and Adrienne always conned me into listening to in the car. "Look, I've gotta go. I have to finish my coffee before I can clock in. I'll see you tonight though, 'kay?"

I nodded to myself, "Yeah. See you tonight. Bye Adrienne."

"Bye Sam!" there was a click and she was gone.

Finally, I felt tired. I closed my eyes and tried to relax. I still didn't fall asleep until the sun climbed up into the sky, above the mountains and the clouds, and lit up all of Covington a hot, sweaty bright yellow.