I'd been lying in bed all day. I was in love with him. And I thought he, with me. I've never been so wrong, so depressed. I couldn't even fathom reality right now. Harry, my Harry, cheated on me. I wasn't good enough for him anymore, if I ever was. I'd been listening to music all day, crying. My phone was turned off as soon as I woke up, I don't want to talk to anyone. No one mattered anyway. I wondered how many times Harry tried to call or text. Maybe none. He could just go to a club and easily pick someone else up, since he's proven he doesn't need me.
The music was so loud in my room I hadn't realized someone was knocking. So it took me by surprise when a large figure burst into my room.
I was frozen. He reached over and turned off the music and the silence was painful. His face was red, he'd been crying, hard.
As much as I was tempted to run into his arms and hug and kiss him and forgive him, I couldn't. I couldn't deal with him, couldn't deal with the risk of him forgetting about me again. Just as he started breathe out an apology through his tears I jumped out of bed and, while avoiding eye contact, pushed by him, into the hall. I kept walking, not knowing whether or not he followed, and went outside. I didn't know where I was going but I knew it had to be out of here. When the outside air finally cleared my head enough I realized I heard him shouting after me.
"Please stop, you didn't give me a chance, I'm sorry!" I ignored him. It hurt, but I ignored him. I walked towards the fountain, for lack of a better destination. I heard his footsteps following behind me. For someone who cares little enough about me to sleep with someone else, he sure is persistent. I know in running from him, but I honestly would be hurt even more if he stopped trying. At the same time I told myself I was never going to take him back.
I made it to the fountain and stopped. Where else was I gonna go? I turned around to face him.
"Please. I'm so sorry. You don't understand how much you mean to me." He cupped my face in his hands as he rambled off his lies to me. The tears started coming harder and I felt disgusted with him. I couldn't even look at him. I tore away from him. I turned my back and sat on the edge of the fountain. I put my face in my lap and bawled. I'm pretty sure I heard Harry cry harder and sit down beside me. This time at least he was smart enough to keep his distance from me.
Still ignoring Harry's gaze I reached in my pocket and found a coin. It was the only one I had with me. I stared at it for awhile. It was shiny, beautiful. I wondered if that made it any luckier. A tear dropped down my face and landed on the coin. Without drying it off I threw the coin in the fountain and wished that Harry still loved me. Then I got up and walked away, leaving him behind. I think I could almost hear his heart shatter.
----------
It's been 3 weeks since I left Harry. I still think about him every night, but I'm getting happier. I'm feeling better. And I hope it's the same for him.
I walked outside and headed towards the fountain, it's a daily routine now. Everyday I wish for the same thing, though. I don't think the magic is there anymore because it still hasn't come true. I always wish for him. For Harry. When I got to the fountain and pulled out a coin, I kissed it for good luck. I closed my eyes tightly and wished that he still loved me. That he'd come back to me. I threw it in and watched it sink to the bottom. Then I left. Just like I left Harry 3 weeks ago.
As I turned a corner to head home, I saw Harry, and who I assumed to be his friend, maybe the person I'd been replaced by, siting beside him. I noticed Harry was crying and a retreated behind the brick building beside me. This is the first time I'd seen him in weeks and he looks exactly how I left him. Red faced, in tears. I peeked around the wall to try to figure out what was going on. Luckily, I was close enough to hear.
"It's been 3 weeks and you haven't even tried to call?" His friend questioned in shock. I wasn't sure if Harry replied quietly or not at all, his back was to me.
"Harry why would you just give up? I thought you were in love!" His friend was angry now.
"I am! But..." His sentence was broken off by his own sobbing. "I don't know what else I'm supposed to do. I screwed up, I can't fix it this time." He managed to get out in between sobs.
"Harry you are going to lose the best thing that's ever happened to you! What are you doing? Get up and go--"
"Stop! It's too fucking late! Theres' nothing left I can do, it's been 3 weeks. It's over!" Harry yelled then got up and walked away.
Maybe the fountain hasn't lost it's magic. I'm positive they were talking about me. Harry thinks I've given up on him, so he gave up on me. I sat down on the street and cried. He still loved me.
