Resisting the Inevitable

I'm strong, I can take it!

As I flip another page in my book, I hear my parents arguing.. about me. You see my mother, she's on my side. She's not ready for her baby girl to grow up and take on the responsibilities of the pack. Although I don't like her reason, I like her way of thinking. I'm not too young, I'm just not ready. Hell, even if I was 30 I don't think I would be ready. It's just not something I'm interested in.

My father on the other hand, he is all into the idea of me taking over as Alpha. He says he's ready for a break. I do see where he is coming from. Being the Alpha of one of the largest packs in North America for almost 27 years takes a toll on a person. You see my dad, Alpha Kayne, had to take over the Maynor Pack when he was 18 because the pack got hit hard with hunters when my grandfather, Alpha Damien, was Alpha. And being the noble Alpha he was, he sacrificed himself for his pack. Although, only about 30 people made it and the other hundreds passed away, everyone seems to think they owe him. But that's what an Alpha does. They put the packs needs before their own. My dad had to end up taking the position when he was 18, 3 years before the average Alpha is supposed to take their position. From all the training my grandpa put my dad through, he was ready. He might have been younger than most in the pack, but he was born to be next Alpha.

See, I'm not ready for that kind of thing. I'm only 18. My dad thinks since he took over at that age, so can I. But that's where he's wrong, I'm not him, and I sure as hell am not ready. I'm pretty sure I wont even be ready when I turn 21. I blame my parents for this anyway. Typically its a male that takes over as Alpha, but after I was born my mother got into a horrible accident and wasn't able to have anymore children. So I'm stuck with something I don't want.

Another thing that comes with the title is a mate. Most people can't wait for their mate, but me, I don't want one. I'm not sure if I can depend on someone for the rest of my life. Or even be with only one person for the rest of my life. I've only had 2 boyfriends. And thanks to my dad, those lasted less than a month. Not that I wanted them to last any longer, I'm just not the dating type. I'd rather be alone with a good book than be with a guy. And I'm pretty sure any guy that wants to be with me, only wants me for my power. It's sad, I know, but that's the truth, I only have 1 true friend, and the rest are fake. Just because I'm the soon-to-be alpha, people treat me like royalty. And I'm anything but.

Listening closer to the voices I can tell my dads almost to his breaking point. My birthday was 2 months ago and he's been trying to get me to take over ever since. And I've only had one answer, no. I can tell that my mom is close to losing it too so I deiced to go and talk to them about this, once again.

Closing my book and putting it on my side table, I get off the bed and head to door. I stick my head out to see if I can tell where they are. Ahh the living room. Unlike most packs, we don't have a pack house. Each family has their own house. As I make my way down stairs, I'm already getting a headache, we have this conversation almost everyday, and it always ends the same way, with me running to my room to cry and my parents fighting.

"....no Kayne, you don't understand, she's my baby. The only child I have. And I will make sure I keep her protected for as long as I can." Oh man, she sounds like she's about to start crying.

Before dad can I reply I interrupt them, "Hey guys."

"Hey Delani." comes their collective response. I seat myself on the lay-z-boy and make myself comfortable.

"So what are you guys talking about? Something serious I'm guessing because I can hear you all the in my room." I ask them

They both just squint their eyes at me, I can tell they both know I'm being sarcastic.

"Have you given it anymore thought Del?" Dad asks.

"Of course I have, that's all I can think about thanks to you and some of the pack members. I know you think I'm ready but I can assure you I'm not. I don't even have a mate yet, how do you want me to take over the pack without him? That's almost impossible. You had mom the whole way. And you were ready for it, I'm not. We are two different people Dad. I'm sorry to disappoint you, but I'm not ready." By the time in done I can feel the burning sensation at the back of my eyes, which means im about to start crying. I hate crying in front of people because it makes me seem weak, and that's one thing I'm not.