Earnshaw Heights

Chapter Twelve

Lauren gripped the icy edge of the toilet and felt herself heaving against her will. Her stomach was in absolute turmoil, and she felt tears escaping down her cheeks in disgust. Her stomach continued to churn despite the fact that she had not eaten all day. At least my body waited until night to totally break down on me, Lauren thought to herself, thankful for the fact that everyone in the suite should already be sleeping. She flushed and slumped back against the wall of the bathroom, a soft sob escaping in the process. She was miserable. She was used to her mind tormenting her nearly every moment, but it was rare that it made her so physically sick over her thoughts. Then again, with tomorrow being the first day of classes, how could she expect anything more?

In just a few short hours, seven, to be exact, she would be sitting through her first class at Earnshaw Heights. A class that had sparked her interests, yes, but still. She knew that her peers would be watching her, scrutinizing her every move, just waiting for her to reveal herself as the wicked, dark witch that she had fought so hard against becoming; and Lauren knew it was only a matter of time before she proved them right. She was dark. And in a few hours, everyone would see it with their own eyes. She let out another sob and felt her stomach start to churn again. She sat up, taking deep breaths, attempting to calm herself down.

Through her deep breathing, she heard a soft knock at the door. Unable to speak, she frantically wiped the tears away from her eyes and stood up to at least put up a front that she was fine as the door creaked open on her. She was surprised to see Niall standing in the doorway, realizing only now she had been expecting Normani to come to her rescue.

"Hey, uhm," Niall mumbled, looking down at the floor, also seeming surprised to have stumbled across Lauren in the bathroom. "Listen, I just heard some not so pleasant noises in here, and I wanted to make sure whoever was in here was okay and..." he trailed off, unable to form another sentence. Honestly, it might have been the most he'd ever spoken to Lauren face to face, especially with the two of them being alone.

"Yea, I'm just feeling a bit sick, but thanks anyways," Lauren managed. She had never gotten a moment alone with Niall before. There had been so many times that she had tried. So many things that she had needed to say to him after her mother's attack on his family. So many apologies. But when it came down to it, in this moment, she couldn't even form a normal sentence. All she could do was stand frozen, mimicking his loss for words. What could she possible say to make anything okay right now, years and years later?

"Well, I guess if you need anything I'll be over in my room. But you've got Mani, so. Yea." He turned to leave, but Lauren caught his hand in her own. He whipped around quickly, staring at her hand on his, confusion and anger evident on his face at her touch. Lauren quickly pulled away, nervously running her hand through her hair. He continued to look at her, clearly not leaving without some type of explanation, but Lauren wasn't even sure what had led her to grab him in the first place.

"I just," Lauren began, hoping that the words would simply come out without her knowing what they were. "I care about her. Genuinely. But I'm sorry." And there it was. That was something that she needed him to know. She knew what her involvement with Normani meant for him. That he would now have to deal with Lauren's presence in his life even more than he wanted to, probably even more than he could bear. And for that, she was so so sorry. But Normani and Lauren, and most likely Niall as well, knew that it couldn't be undone now. They couldn't stay away.

"You can't ever hurt her," Niall stated abruptly. Lauren hadn't expected Niall to say anything back at all, and by the look on his face, he seemed just as surprised at his boldness to speak back to her. "I mean it," he began again. "If this is something that I have to deal with in my life, I'll do it for her. But if you ever do something to fuck this up, I swear-"

"I know," Lauren stated, cutting off Niall's sentence. He turned to leave to return to his room, but Lauren had to say one last thing.

"I'm sorry," Lauren nearly shouted after him, the urgency clear in her voice. She had rehearsed speech after speech in the past, written down all of the things she would say to him if she ever got a moment alone with him. But all she could muster out was I'm sorry, because in reality, those were the only words that she could find. The only words that could express what she felt in that moment and after all of the years that had passed. She was so fucking sorry.

Niall hesitated, his back still to the witch. "I know," he replied, and walked into his room, closing the door behind him.