Chapter 19: Choosing between what is easy and what I truly want

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Becca's P.O.VJust as I was drifting off to sleep, the bell rings. I walk out of class. Girls hiss and whisper bitch under their breaths.
Are Noah's girlfriends usually treated like this? I open my locker.
nude bras fall out of my locker and pads are stuck on my locker.

"Bitch!" one says.
"Here's a nude bra." says another
"You are probably the ugliest girl in school, wait the whole wide world." says another.

"Noah probably only likes girls with huge ugly hips. You're just lucky." says the next.
I keep reading. Stop reading! My mind demands, urgently. But my curiosity wins and I read all of them.
Soon I am holding back tears. No one deserves to be treated in this way, even Sadie.


The last one hurts the most. "I wish you died on the island." It's from Sadie.
Tears stream down my face and I pull off all the pads on my locker.
I pick up the nude bras and throw them into the lost and found box. Girls laugh and smirk.

"Becca-
"Look Noah, I like you a lot, but look at me and look at you. You are popular and hot. And I am not! It just doesn't work. I'm sorry." I burst into tears and ran.

Over and over I see Noah's hurt expression. As I ran, girls threw bras at me. I hear footsteps behind me. I hurry towards Stacy's car.
"Please Becca. Please." Noah pleads with me. I get into the car.

"No, I just can't. Please leave me alone." I sobbed, I close the door and Stacy's sister, Audrey starts the car. We drive away.
Noah looks heartbroken.

*** The car stops at my house. Stacy and Audrey quietly sits.
"Are you alright?" Stacy asks.

I nod. I take a deep breath. I enter my house and as soon as I hear the car drive off.
I flung my school bag and run upstairs to my room. I bury my face into my pillow and sob. The door opens.

"Honey? What's wrong?" My mom says, peeking her head inside. Through sobs and tears I tell her what happened.
"So you are just going to end the relationship, because they think you're not good enough." she asks.

"No, I am ending the relationship, because I am not good enough for Noah and I think he is just using me." I answer, wiping my eyes.
"Let me get one thing straight, Noah is crazy over his heels in love with you. I am not blind, I seen the way he looks at you. His eyes are always on you." She says.

"He is a player, mom" I said, looking away.
The doorbell rings.

Mom goes to get the door. I can't help, but eavesdrop.
"Mrs. Evans, may I please speak to Becca?" He asks.
"No, she's in a bit of a fragile state, right now." My mom replies.
"Oh, can you please tell her that, I stopped by?" He asks, running his hand through his hair, looking disappointed.

"Sure, honey." Mom says as he leaves. She shuts the door and heads into the kitchen.
I peek out the window and see Noah sitting in his car.

His face in his hands. Is he crying? He lifts his face and he's not.
He looks miserable. He looks up and our eyes meet. For the first time, I avert my eyes.
My heart feels like it's been snapped in half.


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