Through my eyes (boyxboy)✔

T.M.E 2

At lunch time I couldn't escape fast enough. William cornered me with his friends. They shoved me around a bit. They didn't hurt me that day, which was a miracle. Lucas wasn't with them. When they let me go I had my lunch. The day was turning out to be a good day.

I said 'good' day, so it is safe for you to assume that I'd enjoyed my time with Lucas. I was still floating in a bubble because of it, so much so that being shoved by big bulky people back and forth wasn't uncomfortable.

I still couldn't believe what had happened. I'd really thought Lucas was straight. He'd had two girlfriends in the time I'd known him, ever since he became friends with William. He didn't strike me as bisexual.

I daydreamed about the kiss all day. I'd never been kissed like that. I could still remember his lips on mine, moving skillfully. He definitely wasn't a kiss virgin like I was. Truthfully, that was the best time of my life. Moments like that were few and far in between.

My good mood sickened William. He cursed me and called me names. I'd heard all of the names: fag, asshead, dickless shit, assbucket, fartface, dicksucker, dickwagon, buttlicker, smegma licker, ratfuck, teddybear-humper and my favorite; slackjawed cork-thirsty cum-dumpster. He'd even asked me what dildo size I wanted for my birthday. I won't say his words didn't hurt, but they hurt less than the other days. William went as far as asking me why I was smiling. It was a shock to him that I knew how to smile because I didn't do it often. I shrugged and said nothing.

Lucas didn't text me like he said he would- at least not in the time frame I had expected him to. By dinner time that night there still wasn't a text from him. Slowly, but surely, my in-the-clouds feeling was disappearing. What if he had used me?

Of course he had used me. He wanted experience and he'd gotten it. There was nothing Lucas would want with me. I had nothing to give. Sure my mom called me 'cute' but all mothers were programmed to say that about their kids. William told me every day, I was a fucking ugly fucktard!

When I went to my room after dinner, I just collapsed on the bed. I should have seen it coming. I had to hit my bed with my pillow just to make me feel better, better enough to look at my mirror without crying.

I had mixed feelings about what looked at me back. Sometimes I found my oval head, olive skin, blue eyes, pink lips and midnight-black short hair striking. Sometimes I found it dull and uninteresting. How could I not?

My phone beeped on the bed. It was quite unusual for it to do so. I rarely received texts. I went to get it.

WhatsApp message from Lucas T

My eyes widened. Lucas had sent me a message like he said he would. I couldn't allow myself to be happy though. I still felt like I had been used. He wasn't bisexual. He'd wanted experience and I had been the perfect candidate. It had probably been a spur of the moment thing. He'd softened me with his words.

I opened the App and the text.

L: Hey, sorry. I wanted to text you earlier but I've been kind of busy. It's Lucas.

His profile picture was of a dog. I debated whether to answer him or go on with my boring action-less existence. He was still online. I made a decision.

N: Hi. It's fin- I wrote and decided to erase the last part. It was anything but fine.

L: How are you?

N: I'm fine, you?

L: I'm okay. What are you doing?

I wished he would just get to the point. Why did he contact me?