The Parenthood Drabbles

Avengers

Avengers

In the style of Emily Zhang and Mars

"Who the hell are you?" Emily asked panting.

"No; you're the one carrying the ancient weaponry in the middle of Vancouver. Who the hell are you?" He replied.

"You're the one who's summoned by it and popped up here, it's not my fault you need an introduction." Emily said.

He didn't budge.

She sighed, frustrated. "Emily Zhang, not a demigod."

"Not-a-demigod's not a very Asian surname." He said.

"And neither is kickboxing but keep irritating me and that's how you're going down." Emily said.

"What are you then? A legacy?"

"Barely."

"Care to elaborate?"

"Care to give me a name?"

"We'll see."

The silence was stretching out and the air was so tense, Emily felt like something was going to snap in the universe.

"I'm blood of Pylos."

He froze in recognition and then nodded appreciatively. "So that's what happened to the line of Periclymenus..."

"Yes. Complete and utter perfection; now who the hell are you?" Emily asked.

He smiled at her and took off his sunglasses. Emily saw fire where irises and pupils should be.

"Mars Ultor, god of war." He declared as if that should be impressive.

"That means Mars the Avenger, right?" Emily asked amused.

"Right. Why do you ask?"

"Oh, nothing, just a question. I have those all the time." She said, grinning to herself.

A few questions later this one came up on his behalf.

Want to get some coffee?

•

Where are you off to?" Emily asked. "It isn't even late yet."

"Yeah, I know, but I have business back home." Mars said. "There's a problem. Again. With something else. Or maybe the same thing as last week- I don't even know what the council's doing with itself anymore. I'll make it up to you, I promise."

"It's okay Thor." She said kissing his cheek. "Get yourself back to Asgard."

"I still don't understand half of what you say."

"For gods' sakes, pick up a comic book." She said.

•

Alright Tony Stark, listen up..." Emily said.

"Tony Stark?" He asked, raising his eyebrows.

"Yes. Tony Stark is my favourite Avenger, you should be flattered."

"What the hell do the Avengers have to do with this?" Mars asked.

Emily crossed her arms and tapped her foot on the ground for a few seconds, waiting for him to get it.

"Zhang," he sighed when he finally got it.

•

He blocked her strike and managed to twist her arm, forcing her back. He used that second during which she was processing twenty things at once to trip her, and pin her down.

"See, Zhang? I'm a super soldier. You aren't going to beat me."

"Whatever you say." Emily said before stretching her neck up to kiss him. He put a hand on her back to hold her closer. As pleasant of a kiss as it was, Emily broke it to accomplish her original goal. She used the distraction to flip him over. She pinned him now, and a sense of pride swelled up inside her.

"Wow. I can beat up Captain America. I'm like Black Widow." She grinned, starring down at his frustrated and disappointed face.

•

"Gods, Emily, I'm not saying you're weak or anything you're just not unbreakable so quit going after all the monsters!" Mars said. "If something happens to you do you have any idea how...?"

"For the love of Jupiter, I sprained an ankle." Emily said. "It isn't the end of the world, Hulk."

Mars closed his eyes and ran a hand through his short hair.

"Am I really in that much of a pissy mood?"

"Well, I'm under a lot of pain medication and am feeling needy right now," Emily said. Her shoulder had just been dislocated by a Cyclops who'd literally picked her up and tried to rip it out of his socket. He probably would have succeeded if it wouldn't have been for her hidden party trick. "So yes."

"I'm sorry," he said sitting down on the couch next to her and gathering her in his arms. He allowed cuddling for the whole afternoon, which was nothing short of a miracle.

•

Emily slipped the key-necklace back into her shirt and pushed the attic's trapdoor open. She climbed up and flicked the lights on.

Mars climbed up and whistled.

"Impressive stock you Zhangs have."

"Stop trying to suck up," Emily said. "My family would kill me for letting an outsider see this."

"Even a god of war?"

"Especially a god of war, so unless you wish me a painful death, mums the word." Emily said. She noticed him observing a dao; a single-edged Chinese sword.

"Paws off Mars, that's from the Han Dynasty," Emily said. "Even I'm not allowed to use that one. Besides, it's out of context; we're just here to test your 'I can handle any weapon' theory."

"A dao is a weapon."

"Yeah, but you're a war god. You've used flashy and manly weapons like swords for ages. A dao can't possibly be out of your usual repertoire."

"So what are you going to throw at me?" Mars asked, hands in his pockets and leaning smugly against the wall.

Emily climbed on a bench and reached up to a shelf and dislodged a heavy leather bag, and the bow tied to it.

"I'm no archer," Mars said.

"Aha!" Emily said with a grin. "Even I can shoot decently."

"Hey, when did I say I couldn't handle it?" Mars said defensively. "I just said it wasn't my usual weapon of choice."

"Your pride's going to be your downfall," Emily said shaking her head. "You can't just not use a weapon because it's 'cowardly' or whatnot."

"That's my armies' mentality, not me." Mars said.

"Oooh, your armies," Emily said sarcastically.

"Say what you want, but the Romans were badass."

"Yes I know," Emily said. "And so were their archers." She said handing him the bow and quiver. "There's a target on that wall over there- nail it."

He draped the quiver over his shoulder, notched an arrow and took his aim. He was frozen forever, just holding the arrow poised.

"Hesitant, aren't you?"

"Shut up, Zhang," he said. He let go of the arrow and it hit the target in the red zones next to the bulls-eye.

"Aww," Emily said mocking his fine shot. "Not quite."

"You're insane," Mars said looking at her.

"Am I?"

She snatched the bow from him and took an arrow from his quiver. Two seconds later an arrow was in the bulls-eye.

"I win the bet, Hawk Eye" she said with a smile.

I can't even tell you how much I love this one. I'm waiting to feel your pain when we reach 100, if just these early ones are giving you such feelz. :p