Every Consulting Criminal Needs A Companion (Wholock)

The Almost Human

Author's Note: I'm fangirling inside, but none of you will know why until the end! >:3 Omg, I'm a frickin mini-Moffat.

Also, don't be silent readers! I'd love some helpful critizism. If anyone has some suggestions, fire away!

*~*~*~*~*~*

The Soldier gracefully exited the cab, pulling sunglasses down from his forehead to cover his eyes from the intense sunlight. He was wearing a tan shirt and an raggedy old rainbow scarf despite the heat. He hummed a soft tune, watching the sky. It was like he knew something that no one else did. Strange. He made his way to the morgue, pulling open the door. He never got to walk in though because a tall, skinny man appeared out of no where, grabbed his arm, and then they both disappeared.

The Soldier surved his new surroundings quickly. Tall, empty and metal walls. Probably some sort of abandoned garage. What planet? Air is stable, and obviously used. That means it doesn't have to be filtered constantly, so it's natural. A planet similar to Earth then? He was also alone. He also noticed, a bit late, that he was laying on the ground. A bit surprising he hadn't felt the cold of the cement paving. He shifted into a sitting position, wondering where he was exactly. Not knowing was one of his biggest pet peeves. Also being kid-napped.

"Hello?" he called. It sent a sort of echo through the garage-type-place. A door creeked, and a small, black-haired girl with beautiful brown eyes walked through, studying him curiously.

"Sorry about... this," she apologized. She was wearing an ear piece and holding what looked like a metal bar in her hands, which were cased in large, blackish leather gloves. The Soldier feigned a scared expression.

"Please, I-i..." he stuttered. Too trusting. She'll be easy to trick. Just as he'd thought, she glanced at the crow bar and tossed it aside, making a clank. As she got closer, he could hear paniced scolding through the headpiece. I wonder who that is. Some sort of ring-leader?

"Look, um, we come in peace." The Soldier stood up, coming an inch or two above her. He dashed around her, picking up the crow bar. He balanced it over his shoulder, smirking at how innocent the girl looked.

"You honestly think I'd trust someone like you?" he sneered. "Now, your name?" He lifted the bar up, swinging it skillfully around on his arms. The girl frowned.

"Doctor?" she asked into the earpiece. The Soldier guessed they were talking about something. He watched patiently, a bit irritated that she seemed to not be the least bit scared. Then, she took out a smoking ball, with she threw at him. He stared at it after it landed on the ground, and slowly, everything went black.

---

The Soldier woke again, a girl standing above him. She wasn't armed. That's good, I guess. Odd girl. Black hair; brown eyes. Kind of cute. Huge gloves though. What were they for. "Great. Large garages: my weakness," he sassed. The girl frowned and held out a gloved hand to help him up. "No thanks." He moved to a sitting position, looking for a door or something. He found one and watched it tentatively to see if anyone else would come in.

"Um, hello. I'm Clara," the girl told him.

"The Soldier," he answered curtly. He slipped a hand into his pocket, taking out his favorite keepsake: a pistol. "I'm going to have to ask you to show me the way out." He was aiming it spot on her head.

"Doctor?" the girl sighed into a small headpiece. After a moment, she took out a strange smoking ball and covered her mouth. Again with the passing out. (Staying awake is overrated anyway.)

---

The Soldier woke in an unfamiliar garage-looking building. A strange girl stood above him. Well, not standing, kneeling. There was also someone standing above him: a tall, skinny man. The one from earlier. He tried to scoot away, but his head throbbed and protested movement.

"Don't move yet. The smoke is still taking its effect on you, and it might take a while." The Soldier groaned.

"Where am I?" he asked slowly, not trusting his head to firgure it out for him.

"Still in London," the man answered, smiling at him for some reason. "Oh, and please don't try killing Clara this time."

"What?" the Soldier said, dazed. The girl, Clara, giggled. The Soldier had no idea what they were talking about, not even a vague memory.

"Soldier-" the Doctor calmly adressed.

"H-how do you know my name?" the Soldier asked. He was too stunned to ask any more angrily.

"His eyes are dialating. Is that a good sign?" Clara asked. The Doctor frowned.

"Get his arms. I'll get his legs." Clara slipped an arm under his shoulders and pulled him into a sitting position; the Doctor took hold of his legs. The Soldier closed his eyes and focused. 1, 2, 3, 4... 1, 2, 3... 1, 2... 1... He fell limp in their arms. Just like that, and everything went black again.

---

Next, he awoke in a bright white hallway. He was on a flat metal table; a heavy white sheet covering him. Molly. Molly was standing above him now, holding a clip board and writing on it busily. He felt much better now, but was too tired to try getting up at the moment.

"Molly, why am I naked?" he questioned smugly. She jumped a little and yelped, too. How cute.

"Oh my god! How are you not dead?! Your heart--it stopped!"

"I know. I made it," he retorted, glancing around. There were other people. All of them were paler than he. That should've been a give-away. Well, he was lucky they hadn't noticed, even though it was quite obvious. "It's something you learn after being in the Time War. And Molly, can I have some clothes?"

"It was thirty minutes!"

"A record!" he exclaimed sarcastically. "Now what about those clothes? A scarf, at least." She glared daggers at him.

"Molly! What about tha-" Curly black hair, high cheekbones? That's my Sherlock! he thought smugly to himself.

"Sherlock! Glad to see I'm alive?" he chimed, sitting up. Sherlock made a confused face at him. "Don't you believe in aliens, Sherlock?" the Soldier asked, tilting his head. "Because I'm one. I'm a Time Lord, Sherlock." Sherlock wasn't picking up. The Soldier looked really insane right now though. Molly took out her phone and dailed in a number. She glanced around worriedly until a muffled voice came through.

"Yes! ... He is a Time Lord! ... No, he woke up. ... Yes, he's not dead. ... He said he stopped his heart. ... Okay. Come as soon as possible." She glanced up at Sherlock after shutting her phone. "Now really isn't a good time."

"But you..."

"Good-bye, Sherlock!" the Soldier teased as Molly shooed him out. "Have fun stayin' alive!"