Lonely

.1

I can't help the thoughts that swarm my thoughts at night. Some things stick with you forever, words do hurt. People at school telling me that I should just kill myself, telling me that I'm ugly, telling me I don't deserve anything but to die. I know I'm not the most pretty, skinny, or even the nicest, but I'm the best me that I can be. I have one friend named Braden, we've been friends since the first year of middle school. Its always been Jade and Braden, you either had to be friends with both of us, or neither of us.
I admit, I have liked Braden for about 2 years now. He's never liked me back. He's always liked other girls and dated other girls, but I didn't want him to know I liked him so I kept it a secret and never told anyone. I mean, let's be honest, he was my only friend so it wasn't that hard to not tell anyone.
Braden was my life saver. My family is wealthy, and doesn't really care about me. Sometimes I stay at Braden's for days at a time and I never get one message or call from either of my parents asking where I am or if I'm okay. Yes I know that that's what most teenager want so that they can go out and party with there friends, and maybe I wouldn't care so much that they're like this if I actually had friends to party with. I like keeping myself quiet, turning in assignments on time, and not making too big of a fuss at school. I had one of his hoodies on and Nike shorts, and I wasn't going to change. Every time we go to the football games for Bridgewood High School I always "forget" to take a hoodie or jacket so he'll give me his. I've got a pretty good amount of Braden's jackets by now. My phone started ringing interrupting me from my thoughts. I let it ring for a while listening to his ringtone which is Fall in Love by Barcelona. I answered about 15 seconds after it started ringing and was shaken up by the abrupt scream of "JADE!!!!!" in the familiar voice of Braden. I screamed "BRADEN!!!" in response of his outburst and we both laughed.
"How are you, Jade?" he asked. This would normally be weird for a best friend to ask you since best friends usually talk and tell each other everything. It wasn't weird for me and him, though. He always asked me this. You could never tell how I was feeling, because I'm so good at hiding my emotions. "Jade? You okay?"
"I'm sorry I got carried away in my thoughts. Yes I think I'm alright right now. No one told me anything that unusual today, well at least nothing I haven't heard before."
"I want to know why they chose you to bully. Why you? Why the hell would they pick on you? You're the nicest most caring person in the world, Jade." those words coming from him made me tingle. Little did he know I wanted to sneak over to his house right now and kiss him until we were out of breath. Little did he know that I loved him. We say we love each other all the time, but I love him much more than a friend.
"Thank you Braden. There needs to be more people like you."
"Just remember to keep your head up Jay, I love you."
"I love you too, Braden." We spent about 45 minutes talking about how we've been friends for 6 years and how we want to be best friends for the rest of our lives.
They always say you'll marry your best friend, and maybe I will. He's my 11:11 wish every night, he's why I sometimes cry, through the pain, through tears, I love him with everything I have.