Lighters & Cigarette // Zayn Malik

CHAPTER: 1

Lighters & Cigarette

Warning: This book contains swearing the amount of water in the sea and you might come across some naughty stuff. some text may seem familiar, No Copyright Intended.

KYRA BENSON 

I'm not the girl your mom told you about, her imagination was never this good....

Everyday i wake up expecting to be in a different place, kinda like the movies, when you wake up in someone else body and have to live like them for a short period of time before some f****** miracle happens and you get swapped back.

But when the all too familiar sound of cars honking out my window are the source to wake me up, i realize things that happen in movies......stays there. The car honks force me to peel my eyes open and when my sight falls on the same old paint crumbling off the wall, the cracks that cover them after every inch or two,  the flickering light bulb that usually causes a head ache, but I'm used to it now, I know nothing's changed.

Life is not fun and games, its a struggle, a struggle towards death.

The silence of my little, messy apartment is then disturbed by the sound of old springs as I rise from my bed and make my way to the bathroom.

If you are judging me by the looks of my apartment that I'm poor, you're wrong! i barely live here, its just a place for me to sleep. I'm rarely home. Come on when you have a million dollar's in your bank account, you have to work day and night to spend it

i haven't earned half this money. and no i haven't stolen it either. before my grandad died he gave it to me, he was like a father to me since i spent my entire childhood with him. We were the total opposite of what a normal family used to do. i lived with my grandad and i used to go home for the summer and since i was like his own daughter he signed off every dime he earned to me. the rest half, well i shall get back to that later...

i stripped out of my clothes, the same ones i had on last night at the club. they pooled on the tile floor as i stepped in to the shower. i let the warm water hit my bare skin and drain away all the stress in my body.

so lets start with me. first, I'm KYRA BENSON. haven't heard of me? good. i don't even want you to know me because if you do you'll stay. and regret it later. I'm not perfect, are you? So don't even stop by to pick out a flaw because i'm full of them. people stare at me and mothers whisper to their children  "these are the kind of bad girls you need to stay away from". if you think you know a bad girl, you don't. We are so much more than leather jackets and cigarette breaths, vodka shots and street brats, combat boots and regrets. we are just like you, we only have a different way of dealing with our problems. 

you cut because people scream shit at you, we just got to a club and let the music take over. you cry yourself to sleep, we dance all night and fill ourselves up with alcohol. we just deal differently....

i turn off the shower, wrapping a towel around me. i step out of the shower letting the cool breeze hit me causing shivers to run down my spine. sunny weather is rarely found in London...and apparently today is not one of those rare days. the rain drops trailed down on the glass windows leaving wet streaks. For me, i think i love this weather, its just so film-ish....walking down the street you'd feel like you're one of the depressed, lonely girls but it doesn't matter as long as you have the music blasting through your headphones.

 wrapped in my towel i open my wardrobe. a feeling of depression strikes me as the doors slide open. All black. every piece of clothing in here is black, brown or grey, don't worry i have a few white shirts that i like to wear on a peaceful day. i grab a pair of high waist-ed black jeans and a loose tank top.