"I tried to love you"
But you didn't try hard enough
"I tried to care"
But you didn't care enough
"I tried to be there, for you"
But you only came close enough
To see me crumble from your absence
You never heard the tears I cried in silence
You never felt the fear I had of losing you
And even when I did the pain was so much worse
My heart stopped and sputtered back to life
Beating inconsistently, fighting to decide
Every tear weighed heavier and heavier
Every sob louder and more desperate
They taunted me they told me I'll never be loved
And you made me feel exactly that. Love.
And you let me lie in it...and soak it in and bask in it
And I needed it, I depended on it like oxygen
And you took it away as if it never existed
And I choked on the carbon dioxide and cried for you to save me
And you looked through me with no emotion in your eyes
And you watched me suffocate
And you turned your back on me and walked away
And I never felt so much deafining pain until that day.
I still remember the salty taste of my tears
I still remember the rawness of my face
I still remember laying on the bathroom floor
Coughing, through racked thin breaths
I still remember the long empty nights, biting my trembling lips
Squeezing my eyes shut and trying to block out the memories
And the fear I had of you never coming back
And the hope I had that you would
I still remember the void that was cut so deep inside me
That the thought of finding love again only widens it
I still remember that day.
The day you stopped trying
The day you stopped loving me
