Child's Play

Introduction

"Good evening boys and girls. Ladies.... Mmmh, and ah-gentlemen. Turn the lights down low and shut your faces as I wrap you in the cozy blanket of a story. A story as heart-warming and soft as a mother's kiss. Or is it? Shhh..."

"Once upon a time, there was a boat! Now this wasn't just any boat children. It was a ship! A ship full of friends. Hundreds of friends! Best friends, one-and-all! A veritable friendship it was, get it? But it wouldn't be very ladylike of me, if I didn't mention the most noteworthy friend on board; Hatty Hatington. Say hi Hatty! Hatty was like, King friend of friendship kingdom. Best friend to one-and-all, and the walking definition of handsome gentlemen."

"Now one fine morning Hatty and pals set out for a new, exciting adventure. What fantastic wonders would they discover this time? Perhaps they'd come across a scary ghost ship. Perhaps they'd find an island made entirely of candy! Perhaps they'd meet a band of scary, swashbuckling pirates.. And join forces to find an island made entirely of candy! Who knew? But it didn't matter. So as long as they were together, there were smiles to be had and adventures to be shared. Now today it 'twas a day like any other adventury day. Spirits were uncrushably high, everyone was singing and dancing and having a jolly time!"

"When suddenly the ocean was all like; surprise! And a huge, massive storm brewed out of nowhere! WSHOOOOOOO- WSHOOOO- WSHOOOOSHMBLHM... Boy that was quick. WHJOOSHOOJHEH! And there was thunder. BOOM! And the lightning. BOOM! And the wind, BOOMmmSHOOSHOOSHUSHsh -and like that, it was over. 'Is everyone okay?' Said Hatty. 'I don't know what I'd do if I lost even one of you!' Hatty...Continued. But the eye of the storm is very misleading, children. NEVER TURN YOUR BACK ON IT, cause the ocean was all like 'PSYCHE!', and it came back, even bigger this time, twice as big! WHSOOOSHOOOSHOO. As if Poseidon himself, extended his hand in friendship, and they spat in his mouth! WHOOO-SHULOOSGRBRBRBRSHAJAJU-SHJU. Boy, he was piss.. He was mad! SHOOO-WESHOOMEHBHU. And the rain came down like a shower of bullets, AH...AHHH! And the floor boards were buckling and creaking and breaking and pieces of their ship were raining down like shards of broken dreams. And then Reginald comes upstairs and he's all like, 'I say gentlemen, I do believe we're in quite a spot of bother!' And everyone was like, 'REALLY? What tipped you off genius?!' And then Hatty was all like, 'Heey, be nice!' WHSOOO-SHOOSHOOSH. Huge, giant waves thrashed the boat, to-and-fro, fro-and-to. Carelessly sprinkling friend after friend into the cold unforgiving abyss of the deep, dark ocean. Everyone was screaming like, 'HEELP MEEE!' Splash, splash. And there was this huge whale, like; 'Mwaaahhh.' And it made it super scary. And I think there was a shark! WSHOO. Yep there it is, oh god! WHCHOO-SHUDLESHUMBLEDED. Then Hatty was all like, 'Hold onto your butts! LAND HO!' And BANG! BANG BANG! SMASH!

A shipwreck! As foretold by their fate books of... Fate. And while it seems like the end, this is merely the beginning of another fantastic journey for the brave crew of the, S. S.... Friend.. Ship.