The tears streamed down my face.
"You worthless piece of shit! Go die in a hole" my mother screamed at me pushing me away again.
"Yes that's right go find your only friends. Your blades, I'm sure they will come in fucking handy when you hit a vein and kill yourself everyone will be so disappointed. Oh wait they wont because who have you got to care? Nobody."
I whined. These words were like knifes cutting through me, every word she continuously threw at me, made me hate myself even more. It was like being buried in a hole. Nobody was coming to help you they were all just helping to dig you deeper and deeper into the ground. But as a matter of fact she was right.
"Bye you ugly fucker, I'm going out for another drink, ill see you when I get back, or not if my dreams finally become a reality."
I gasped as the tears began to flow down my checks.
"Bye mum" I whispered at the door slammed shut. She was always like this now. Never saying how pleased she was to have me. Never buying me little presents like everyone else's parents would be. Nope, I just get screamed at and abused when she feels like it. Scrap that its most off the time whenever she's near me or in touching distance.
I crawled up the stairs on my knees with the tears gushing out my eyes even faster. What had I done to deserve this? I had always wished for a perfect family or one that loved me. I got to the top of the stairs and stood up, walking towards my bedroom I slipped in and closed the door behind me. Grabbing my blades I took them towards my skin. Sliding them backwards and forwards smiling. This felt so good, stuff my one week clean I didn't care anymore I was in a world off my own.
Slice..
Slice
Slice.
The blood oozed out in front off me, the pain took over my arm and I looked down and smiled. I had missed this. Missing the pain of hurting myself and the pain to make myself feel more useless. Smiling put my blade down and cleaned my wrist, before stroking over my hurts making sure they were there too stay and then I was off into a deep sleep. Maybe one I would never wake up from.
