Squad Goals: Part 1

Three (Radioactive Sloth)

I subconsciously went to rub my eyes, but found I couldn't by a sharp pain clasped around my wrists. My eyes bolted open in fear. This isn't the first time I've been in this type of situation unfortunately..

I was in pastel blue room. Anime styled artwork scattered the nicely coloured walls. Along the border of the tall windows were party lights dazzling and pretty. All together, it was a decent room with two doors (one of which, I'm assuming, is to a closet).

I screwed around with the lighting, letting my captor know that I was fully awake. Surely enough, someone did open the door. It wasn't who I expected, that's for sure. She didn't seem hostile at all. If anything she looked simply annoying.

I had to hold back a laugh as her pale, wiry frame came over to me. Her annoying brunette hair was tinted hideously pink and green at the same time, I almost pitied her for how absolutely horrid she looked! To be honest, she looked like a rat. Her eyes were rodent like, matching practically the rest of her grayish-white face.

The second she opened her mouth, I did laugh. She had this squeaky, prepubescent voice that reminded me of a four year old I once met. I mean, this girl seriously needed help here and there was absolutely no way I was intimidated by something like this.

"What are you laughing at?" She fretted. Oh my, poor washboard-chested child dressed in tiny leggings too big for her, Sketchers and a hot pink t-shirt.

"Oh nothing," I smiled, already annoyed to hell at this iconic mess of a being. She reminded me of an ugly bean. Look at this iconic mes of a human bean. Ahah, I was sure to have fun making savage remarks.

"RUDE!" She exclaimed, slapping me but I barely felt a thing. Weak ass brat.

"It's okay; I don't have a strong hit either." I said to her.

Her eyes widened to the size of the moo- wait a minute, this little rat doesn't deserve a Panic! At the Disco reference. Sorry, let me rephrase that for you, yes?

Her eyes widened, scrunching up her ratty forehead. As if she could get any more hideous. I snickered at the thought, the brat blowing fumes out of her ears angrily and stomping off, barely slamming the door with how weak her scrawny body was. Wow.

"I'M SO DONE WITH YOU!" She screeched, reappearing in the door frame. Like I didn't expect that, though. "I'LL HAVE YOU DESTROYED!!"

I think this time she left but I wasn't too sure. Who cares? She was a whiny brat anyways and soon she'll be put in her place.

Well, now I was alone and bored. I had absolutely nothing to do. I guess I'll try to escape now, which will prove to be easy. I mean, all I had to do was screw around a bit with the electricity, form a spark and cause a house fire.

Or not. I sighed, the familiar brat walking in again, a thing in her hand. That's when it came to my mind. Oh she'll be so easy to trick, so I put on a small show of tears (which was easy looking at her). I pretended to be upset and timid, shying away from her when she came closer with a sympathetic expression.

"What's wrong?" The rat asked, sitting on the edge of the bed.

"I-I-I.... I just wa-wann-a g-g OH GOD.." I faked, the tears making rivers down my face.

"You what?" She flipped her hair. Ew.

"I just.. I've. I-I- OhmyGodkillmeplease. I wanna go ho-o-o-ome. I c-can't ha-handle the s-stress o-oh my gosh I just-" I went on.

"It's okay," She whispered, pulling me into a revolting hug. She smelt like the sea but with a disgusting twinge of perspiration.

Finally, she pulled away and I let go of the breath I was holding, drying my false tears. I looked down to my lap, avoiding the sorry look in her eyes.

"You'll be out soon.. I'm sorry that you have to go through it. I don't even know why you're actually here. I'm sure you'll be out soon enough."

I looked up at her. "Promise?"

"I promise." She smiled.

And that was the beginning of the beautifully false friendship with Ratanna Ash.

-//-

No one but Ratanna really trusted me yet, though I was complying to their every word. I stripped myself of my identity to get myself out of here. I couldn't stand the girls at all. I mean, did Kevin seriously have to chose the bitchiest girls out there to be his 'daughters'? Ugh.

There was Krusty-na xD who was an annoying attention whore.

There was Jackassona Rattyson who was an annoying, violent, doesn't-know-boundaries cunt.

And Ratanna Ash the hypocritical brat whom was the most annoying of them all. Though, she was the most iconic of them all.

Ratanna would tell me about her boyfriend IVan Gogh who looked just as ratty as she. Ratanna told me, and I quote, "He is so hot he gave me a sunburn!"

Dear Ratanna, find a chill.

But anyways, now I was being escorted down into the main dining hall by Ratanna who I learned was the girl in charge. I've also learned from Ratanna that Veronica and Tori were also assigned an annoying bitch to look after them and do as they please. Oh God, I feel sorry for Veronica.. she got Jackassona Rattyson.

I'm going to just state now that no, their names aren't actually that. Ratanna is Rea and Jackassona is Julie and Krusty-na is Krissi. Just, I think the names I gave them are much better.

In the main dining hall I was seated in a baby blue cushioned chair at a long, white table. There was bound to be enough baby blue cushioned seats for at least two dozen people, though there were only five people present. In front of me was a crystal glass filled with red wine, and a pearly white dish containing mashed potatoes, lamb ribs, stuffing, bread and cranberry. There was no way I liked any of this food as I was honestly used to KFC or McDonalds every night.

"Welcome, Lilly." I turned my head to the source. It was none other than Kevin Spacey himself, standing tall in a dragging robe that was feathery white and jewel encrusted. He sauntered over to the large throne like chair at the right end of the table, a pale black haired woman pulling it out for him before pouring his wine and rotating her body as she walked as if she was a model down to the other smaller yet throne like chair, pulling it out for herself.

I gave him a small but respectful nod of greeting. I wasn't quite sure if I was allowed to speak, so I held my tongue.

"Oh how I wish your friends were also here.." He said, pretending to speak to himself. "No matter. How are you enjoying your stay? I'm sorry that we had to threaten and kidnap you, but oh well. We're all cool, yeah?"

I nodded, brushing off his comment about my friends. "Yeah. It's beautiful here." That was the only honest thing I have said during my whole time here. Though, it was a little over the top with the giant crystal chandelier in every large main room.

"I'm glad you like it here." Kevin smiled.

The attention turned to the three annoying girls of his walking into the room, taking a seat all on the same side as me. Eventually the empty seats filled as random friends of Kevin's filled the room. All around me these familiar faces disturbed me greatly. Has Kevin Spacey really gone as far as bringing back dead celebrities like Kurt Cobain and Amy Winehouse?