Losing Control (Violetta fanfic)[Editing]

Chapter 1: Hidden faces

This book will be in Ludmila's POV unless I say it's different.

I tried to snooze my alarm clock with my eyes closed, until my mom  came in. "Ludmila, get off your lazy ass and get ready" she said with  anger in her voice. Since I'm not in the mood for a fight today, I get  up. I walked towards my window, and took a minute to stare outside. The  street had a nice playground. Though it was early, someone was already  on the swing.

The sky had a tint of pink in it. I stared at it and thought back..  My  dad told me if I see a sky like that, I should pray that my life  would be just as wonderful as that sky. I closed my eyes and pressed my  hands against each other. "Lord, make my life just as wonderful as this  beautiful sky" I say softly. To be honest. I wish he was still here.. I  looked at the clock on my wall and picked an outfit. Okay, Ludmilla.  It's time to put that mask on again.

I walked downstairs. The aroma of chocolate milk was in the air. My  mom was eating her breakfast, which was a croissant with chocolate milk.  I was not in the mood for eating breakfast, so I skipped. I walked to  the kitchen, where are the keys are, and took my car keys. "Bye mom" I  say before walking to the door and closing it.

I loved morning drives, especially quiet ones. It makes you focus on  the world around you. Which was simply beautiful. The elemantary school  makes me think of who I was and I know it's not to late to turn back to  that person. But like my mom says, they can't hurt you if you hurt them.  I also drive past the shopping mall, and I see a happy couple, holding  hands. And I get jealous.. Because I know I can't ever have that. I  arrive at the Studio. I saw Franceasa, Camilla and Violetta having a  conversation together. The boys were together with Naty. I can't be  alone today. It's my last day being 18.

"Naty, come here, I need to discuss something with you," I say as I walked over
"Ludmila, she's not your dog. We need her right now," Maxi said looking at Naty.
"But it is IMPORTANT," I said a bit louder this time.
"Ludmi, calm down. I'll be with you in a second, okay? I just have to talk to the boys,"  Naty replied looking at my in the eye.
"Whatever! I don't need you anyway because I am a supernova."

Hopefully  I said that conceiving, because I barely believe myself. I walked away  and sat down in one of the chairs. I made sure no one was looking and  took my diary out of my bag. I took my favorite pen and started writing.

Dear diary,
Today is my last day being 18, and I'm lonely.
I hate pretending but I can't stand the thought of being betrayed. To be honest

I heard someone walk in and I quickly sat on my diary. "Ludmilla,  you're early today" Pablo said with his eyebrows frowned. I didn't reply  and hid my diary in my bag. Everybody starts to walk in. "Ludmilla,  would you like to sing first since you are early today" he said again.

Why? I don't have a song! "I don't have a song," I said kind of nervous. Damn it! Don't be nervous. I'm a supernova!
"Can I look in your folder?," he asked, with frowned eyebrows again.
"Sure, go ahead," I said immedatily regretting my reponse.
"How about you sing this song?"
"No."
"Why?"
"Because I don't want to."
"What happend to our supernova?" Naty said laughing. I hate her, I hate her, I hate her.
"Fine, I'll sing it"

This is Goodnight by Cher Lloyd but let's pretend the songs in this story are theirs. The song is in the media.

"Ludmilla, it is truly a beatufiul song" Pablo said with a schocked expression.
In fact they all had schocked expressions.
"Yeah, whatever" I tried trying not to cry.

But I failed. The tears start running as I went of stage. "Are you okay?" Violetta asked me as she put her hand on my back.
"I'm  perfectly fi-" That's all I could say before I really started crying. I  tried to control my breathing, but I went way too fast. I think by this  point everyone knew I was crying. "Are you okay" Pablo asked really  worried.
"I want to go home, I have stomach pain" I say attempting to conceal the reason
"Is that the only reason"
"Yes"
And  he let me go. I was crying all the way home. I went home, no one was  home. That's great I guess. I took my diary and started writing again.

Dear diary,
Today is my last day being 18, and I'm lonely.
I  hate pretending but I can't stand the thought of being betrayed. To be  honest I wish my real dad was here. I'm happy mom divorced that evil  guy, but I need you here with my dad. I miss your comforting words, I  miss your goodnight kisses, I miss your presence. I wish I could go back  in time, and save you.  I wish I told you to go to the hospital.. Everything  would be different. I would be nice. And maybe even have real friends. I  envy seeing real friends. It reminds me that it's something I will  never get. I wish I didn't have to pretend...

I closed my diary and the tears kept on rolling. When I woke up the next morning I realised, I cried myself to sleep.