unlucky | a.i

seize.

Sabrina's POV

I need to tell him
No, you don't
Yes, I really do
She's his best friend
Which is why I need to tell him 
But it will kill him
She nearly killed me
Just shut up

'UGH' I screamed out. I'd been arguing with my sub continence for almost an hour.  I needed to tell Ashton about what Shelby did to me, but she was practically his only friend apart from the band.

Ash used to tell me about how ever since the boys' career took off, their old friends have been looking at them differently. They've lost a lot of people and it honestly hurts me to watch, but that doesn't mean I shouldn't tell him about what a fucking psychopath his so called best friend is. 

'Knock knock' he giggled, holding two pots of Jello in his hand. I smiled back at him, but the thoughts of Shelby were running round my head as if they were kids playing tag. 

'How you feeling? I got strawberry, since it's your favourite' he winked at me

'Yeah I'm good, and thank you' I smirked back 'Hey Ash..'

'I'm so glad you're okay BreeBree..' he cut me off 'I don't know what I'd do if you'd gone'

'I'm glad I'm okay too Ash bu-'

'Sabrina, shut up will you' and with that, he crashed his plump, warm, pink lips onto my pale, cold ones. The kiss deepened, his hands held my cheeks while my fingers intertwined in his long, curly hair. 

'I missed you Ash' I mumbled between breaths, which made him smile against my lips.

Moments like this with Ashton honestly made me forget everything. The whole world stops, and the focus is on me and him. If someone had told me 6 months ago that I'd be kissing Ashton Irwin right now I would of laughed in their faces and walked away, but Molly taking me to that damn concert was the best thing that ever happened to me. 

'Hey, I have a question' he pulled away and looked into my eyes

'Uh, sure...?'

'How come you didn't want my autograph the first time we met?'

'Because this time 6 months ago I couldn't stand you. But for some reason that all changed' I smiled

'Are you happy that it changed?'

'Happier than I've ever been' I leaned in and kissed him again 

The longer I was with Ashton, the happier it made me. He made me forget all about my alcoholic mum and my abusive brother. Ashton was my drug. I needed him to cope through the day. I know that it sounds really stupid coming from a 19 year old, and all your parents are probably thinking 'she knows nothing about love she's barely a teenager let alone an adult'. But honestly, and I mean this in the nicest way possible; fuck them. I know what I'm feeling, and that feeling was..love..okay maybe I don't know but I definitely think so. 

But there was no way in hell I was gonna tell him. We were only a thing for like 3 weeks, then we broke up, then his best friend tried to kill me.

Shit, I forgot about that. I still need to fucking tell him
No you don't
Not you again
If you tell him you'll loose him
Fuck my life
Ahahahahaaa you're screwed

'Yay' I sighed

'Huh?' Ashton looked at me with a puzzled face

'Oh, nothing' I giggled nervously, trying my best to hide my worry

Ashton's POV

'Weirdo' I kissed her nose and held her pale hand

I looked into her bright, blue eyes, remembering the first time I saw her, and the first time she smiled at me. 

I'm gonna ask her out
No you're not 

My conscience moaned back at me

What do you mean I'm not?
You'll ruin her
Huh?
Think about it, you're a mess, and you come with so much drama. Bet you haven't told her about the nightmares, have you?
Well no, but-
You don't want her to turn into a mess like you, right?
No but I-
Then leave her be, you freak

Annoyingly, I was right. Sabrina knows nothing about me, not really. She just knows all the happy, nice things about me. 

Since we got back from the tour, things have been really different. All of our friends despise us, the media basically ruins our lives, and everyone believes everything they read.
My nightmares about my dad leaving us came back, and how violent and fucked up I used to be. I used to be such a shitty person before the band took off, and now we're back, I'm slipping into my bad habits. 

But maybe she'll change me, she'll make me a better person
You'll turn her bad first
But maybe I won't
You're just like your father, Ashton
No, don't you dare
You're a shitty person who hurts everyone he gets close to. You ruin lives

'STOP' I yelled out, causing Sabrina to flinch back

'Ashton, are you oka-' she asked, worry in her voice

I pulled my hand back 'I'm sorry I-I have to go' I left the room and didn't look back

What the hell is happening to me?

------------

woah

hey kiddies im back did you miss me course you did dont lie to me. soz i aint updated in ages but i kinda forgot about this story till chloe reminded me so say thanks to her lmao

i watched the 5sos livestream last night and i legit cried #soznotsoz

the whole sgfg album got me crying

im listening to ignition by r.kelly rn snd it got me in a weird ass mood

but like hows everyone doing like is you ok is you good bc i gots to know. i care about you guys ygm

OMFG WE'RE NEARLY ON 1K READS FHUINFSBUSIOFN ILYASFM TYYYSSSSFFFMMMMMM LIKE IDEK WHAT TO SAY TO YOU ILY ILY ILY ILY 

come stalk me or holla @ me if u wanna be friends bc i have none 
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Song of the week: Any Way You Want It by Journey bc it's my jam

ILY AS MUCH AS I LOVE ASHTON'S SPEACH FROM #THENEWBROKENSCENE

Please favourite/comment/add to library bc it would mean the world to me

Grace x