Break Down My Walls

chapter 2

    sorry its kinda slow. its more of a filler chapter

       I didn’t tell Leah about him even though she’s my best friend. She just wouldn’t understand. She thinks she knows everything about me and wouldn’t understand if I felt like someone knew me better. She only knows the me that I let anyone see.

     “I just want to know why you can’t tell me who this guy is. It’s obvious you like someone so why can’t you just tell me who he is?”

      “I don’t know what you’re talking about Leah. There’s no one. Trust me, if there was you’d be the first one to know.” And that’s the truth I would tell her first. I just don’t want to tell anyone yet.

      “I can tell that you’re lying. I can’t believe you won’t tell me!!! I’ve been your best friend since first grade the least you could do is admit there is a guy.”

      “…… fine. There’s someone. I just don’t really know who he is. I just met him today.” I told her reluctantly. I knew she at least deserved to know I liked someone.

      “Finally she speakes!!! I knew it! You’ve had that look on your face all day.” She said.

      “What look?? I didn’t have a look!”…did i?

      “You’ve had this dreamy look on your face since study block” damn. She was probably right.

      I stuck my tong out at her. “Whatever. I gotta go though. Homework. Gross.”

      “ughh well have fun with that.” She said sarcastically.

      I rolled my eyes. “Suuuure I will. Bye see you tomorrow.” And started to walk home.

      On my way home I wondered if I would see him again and where. I mean, I don’t even know his name so I can’t ask about him or anything. But he can’t make an impression like that and just walk away never to be seen again. That would just be wrong.

      When I got home the lights were off and no one was home. I went to get something to eat and see if anyone had gone shopping lately, but of course no one had. So I grabbed pretty much the only thing left, crackers and peanut butter, and took them to my room. I had about an hour to finish my homework before my brother and sister, Toby and Kelsey, got home and I had to babysit. So, I put my headphones in and turned the music up as loud as I could bear.

      Focusing on homework became nearly impossible when thoughts of him crept into my mind. I couldn’t help but hope to see him tomorrow in the auditorium again. If I did, I promised myself, I would talk to him. Three-thirty came around quickly, and when I looked at my homework only half of it was done. I guess I’ll be pulling an all nighter again.

      As soon as they walked in Toby and Kelsey were fighting. Like always. This time it was apparently because Toby threw dirt at her and so she hit him. I broke it up by telling Toby it wasn’t acceptable to throw dirt at people and I told Kelsey that just because Toby threw dirt at her it doesn’t give her the right to hit him.

      I dealt with them till 10 o’clock when they finally fell asleep, then worked on my homework till midnight when my mom got back from work. Ever since my dad left us my mom has had to work two jobs and put in as many hours as possible just to keep us in the house. She only goes grocery shopping when we have extra money. The only full meals we usually get to eat are school lunches because we get reduced pay, we snack on whatever’s in the house.

      When I fell asleep that night I dreamt of those endless blue eyes.