The Life That I Have

Chapter 23

Rudi and Anya tried to keep their engagement quiet, but that was easier said that done in a Maquis camp.

  It sparked some controversy, as some of the men were still unsure about Rudi.

  Although she was overjoyed, Anya was feeling a bit depressed about the uncertainty of her future. What happened if she was forced to be alone again, like before? She couldn't manage it now. She had grown dependent on having people and safety surrounding her.

  Sighing, she decided to go for a long walk with Tippy, to clear her head.

  As she wandered through the woods, she noticed that the snowdrops had started to grow. That gave her an idea.

  Crouching down, she began to collect them until she had a generous sized bundle. She then got up and trotted through the woods until she reached the small clearing near the river.

  Anya knelt down and gingerly placed the little white flowers on the small patch of upturned earth.

  "Rest in peace, Derek," she whispered. Closing her eyes, she began to say a silent prayer.

  She gasped as she felt a small tap on her shoulder. Spinning around, she came face to face with a German soldier.

  "Can you tell me the way to the main road?" he asked, in atrocious French.

  Damn! Anya hadn't a clue where the main road was.

  "It's down there. Carry straight on, and you'll reach it," she said the first thing that came out of her head.

  "Can you show me? I was in training, but I got separated from my group," he paused. "What are you doing here?"

  "I like these woods. Is it a crime?" she tried to say innocently.

  "No, it's not. Can you show me the road?" he said it more as an order than as a request.

  "If I must." She stood and started walking in the direction from which she had come– back to the castle.

  "How far is it?" he demanded, impatiently.

  "About ten minutes."

  She wouldn't have to take him all the way back to the castle. They would be picked up by the guards within a half-mile radius of the camp.

  But they weren't. They kept on going until Anya could almost make out the castle through the trees. Suddenly, she realized how stupid she had been. If this German realized that this was a Maquis camp, and then got away, General von Fredrichs would know where they were and would arrange another raid. And it would all be her fault!

  She now was trying to steer away from the castle, but, before she knew it, the German swore angrily at her and was trying to run back into the woods.

  Anya hurled herself at him and grabbed his arm.

  "Help! Somebody help!" she screamed as the German struggled to get free from her grip.

  Within seconds they were surrounded by the Maquis.

  "Let him go," someone ordered. Anya didn't need telling twice. She let him go and slowly stepped away. She wasn't certain what they were going to do to this man, but she could make a pretty good guess. Suddenly feeling sick, she made her way quickly back to the castle, where she ran into Jean-Marc.

  "What have you done?!" he shouted.

  "I haven't 'done' anything," she snapped back.

  "Why did you have to bring him here?!"

  "What else could I have done?!" she shouted back.

  "You realize that if he had got away, YOU would have jeopardized the whole camp?!"

  "Well, luckily, that didn't happen." She turned to leave, but Jean-Marc grabbed her arm.

  "LET ME GO!" she shouted loudly at him, snatching her arm away. She hadn't realized quite how loudly until she had stormed inside, where there was a small crowd of curious people gathering.

  Like an avenging fury, Anya rampaged to her room where she hurled herself down and curled up into a ball.

  It was a moment before Alexander walked in quietly.

  "I heard there was a– a disagreement between you and Jean-Marc," he said tactfully.

  Anya sighed.

  "He's angry at me for bringing that Nazi here," she explained tonelessly.

  "Anya, Jean-Marc is under a lot of stress all the time, especially now, because, apparently, there is talk of the possibility that his wife and children may be arrested."

  Anya remained quiet, staring at the wall, hugging her stomach.

  "Are you alright?" Alexander said suddenly.

  "Of course I'm alright. My God, why does everyone keep on asking me if I'm alright?"

  "Because you're going to have a baby, aren't you?"

  Anya slowly sat up, and stared at Alex, her eyes wide open.

  "How– can you tell?" she asked frantically.

  "My wife is a Midwife," he explained. "Why don't you tell Jean-Marc? He'll understand. Maybe even arrange with Dominique to get you back to England. Have you even told Rudi yet? I assume he is the father. Or is that why you've not told anyone?"

  Those words felt almost like a physical blow to Anya.

  "How dare you!"

  Alex felt guilty. He was being harsh on her for no reason.

  "I'm sorry. But have you told Rudi yet?"

  "No, I haven't told anyone." She began to cry. "I want to stay here with the Maquis!" She looked desperately into his eyes. "Please don't tell Jean-Marc, or Rudi," she begged him.

  "Why not?" Alex asked, exasperated.

  "Because everyone will make such a frightful fuss."

  Alex sighed.

  "Look, how long has it been now?"

  "About three months. I know I won't be able to hide it forever, but..."

  Alexander left the room, exasperated.