Agent (Book 1)

Chapter 40-Nolan

40

Nolan Hood

Agent: 21

Mission: Not Applicable

Date: September 12th, 2089

Time: 0750

I am broken. We all are.

    The civilians in Lynn's group and a few remaining agents are all that make up the ACA. How ironic it is, that in the time that I so desperately wanted to prove myself, everything turned to war and bloodshed. I've released all the faith I might've had, locked it away, buried it deep inside. Through the screams of release, the tortured sobs, the death and the remorse and the agony...

    Through it all, I somehow remain a person. Because no matter how much you tear us apart, and rip away every piece of sanity we have left, we'll always have something left to fight for. Ourselves. Even through everything I've seen, I've done, I've felt, I somehow manage to lock it all away and will myself on.

    Wouldn't it be so much easier if we just learned to give in? Because every time death is within such close proximity, we only fight that much harder. We're human. It's what we do.

    If there's one thing I can take comfort in, it is the sight of Ava, broken and beaten and scarred beyond repair, but still here. Her huge eyes are like the whole world, reflecting the fire, torture, and everything that I cannot say.

    Because I feel those screams, and those sobs, and those deaths and that blood and that pain all in my very core. And I know, that I'll never be one to rid of it.

Even now, I can feel Tenor's laugh, shaking me until I finally give in.

    But if he breaks me, as he'd surely planned to do, I'll still be here, with a beating heart and soul. And a will.

    The sky is a pleasant shade of red outside, and the bulbous sun peeking over the horizon only reflects the image I see every time I turn back. The pile of concrete, showering rubble, flames and destruction. That was my home. Our home.

    I have to force myself to stop looking back at what remains, and surprisingly enough, the red cloaks in the background don't spark any fear in me, as they so often did. They've done their job, for now. The ACA is scattered. Those of us who remain are few, exhausted and injured and with nothing but ourselves to carry into the sunrise. I spot Kamal, a few other agents I recognize. We don't bother speaking. Enough has been said.

    I can tell that Ava's getting tired from all the walking, so I simply scoop her up in my arms and let her rest her head against my shoulder. "What's going to happen?" She murmurs, so small.

    She's already knocked out by the time I can respond. I spend a few moments thinking about it anyway. "We'll be okay," I whisper, more to myself then to her. Because that is what we will do. I'm sure of it.

    I stare into the sunlight as we walk, laying my head in Ava's hair and breathing in her sweet scent. A patch of red dapples my vision below the ball of sunshine. After all, it is the color red to symbolize all of our losses. All of those sought out to destroy us for all we're worth.

But I don't care anymore. We will go on, regardless.

And maybe that's what scares me the most.

END OF BOOK 1