Recovery of The Numb And Broken (boyxboy)

Chapter 1: Rude Awakening

((WARNING! This story contains violence, sexual content, suicidal thoughts/actions, but other wise is funny cute and whatnot. You were warned. Viewer discretion is advised.))

Exiting the stall, I breathed a sigh of relief. No one else was in the bathroom. I turned towards the sink, turning on the faucet to wash my hands and splash water on my face to get rid of the tired look in my brown eyes. I heard the door open and instantly my body flinched. I was thrown onto the wall while lips crashed onto mine. It was rough, forceful, and I could already feel my lips swelling. I was trying to push him away, fighting back, but he just continued. I couldn't get away. I couldn't breathe, I was trapped, and I was scared. He suddenly stopped and I heard a crack as his fist connected with my face. His knee came to my gut and his arm slammed down on my back. I slumped down to the floor, leaning against the wall to keep myself propped up. He began to yell in my face.

"Don't you ever come near me you disgusting fag! This is all your fault for seducing me with that body of yours! Look like a girl. Fucking faggot" he said as he spat on me.

My eyes glazed. I was emotionless. I was used to this reoccurring abuse. It was a random cycle that seemed to continue on forever. I'd either get beaten up behind the school, in the bathroom, yelled derogatory terms at, or get sexually harassed and abused. It was always my fault though. I scoffed. Always my fault huh? I thought. I guess it was.

I attempted to get up from the ground but my body felt weak, I stumbled, and tripped, ending up in the same place as I was before. Dying sounds nice. Was all I thought. My eyes unglazed and emotions hit me like a ton of bricks. I curled into a ball on my side, clutching my head, and sobbing like nothing mattered. I hoped no-one could hear me over the running faucet...

I skipped classes for today. I didn't want to be hounded with questions on why I didn't show up for mods 1& 2, or why I looked the way I looked. Though I guess most people don't question it anymore. They either already know what happened, could guess, or know that I won't give them an answer. Teachers persisted though. They would send me down to the office, the nurses, quidance counselor, anywhere they could to try and get me to talk. The problem is, is that I can't. Once something like this happens, I can't talk, move, see, or hear. I become completely numb and block everything out. Physically I can do those things but, in my mind, its not happening.

It was down pouring as I walked out of the High School doors. It should've been about lunch time now. I spent four to five hours in the bathroom, and no one noticed. I heaved a sigh of loneliness and relief at the thought no one came and saw me like that, and sad that no one came for me. It's because they don't care. A tear silently slipped down my cheek going unnoticed because of the thousands of raindrops falling from the sky, onto my face and hair. I finally arrived at home, taking my key, shoving it into the lock, and twisting the nob to open the door. My parents were still at work, so I had the house all to myself. It's so quiet and lonely. I carried myself to my room, still feeling numb. I didn't know what to do. There was nothing FOR me to do. Maybe I should just die, no one will care, no one will notice. I'll just be another daily death. The idea sounded good to me. What do people care if there was one less person in this world? I took a glance at my arms, the scars they showed. The bottle of prescribed sleeping pills that sat on my dresser. The bathroom, white, clean, and silent. Like a heaven. I grabbed the blade, the pills, and ran to the bathroom. I closed the door and locked myself inside.

My worries started to disappear into the gruesome color. The beautiful color of a rose, love, hate, & fire. The color of red. My body shuddered as the pain seeped into every broken crack of my soul, easing the pain on my mind and heart. Washing away the pain as my body plunged into the soothing innocent clear water that would soon be stained. I wash down the sleeping pills and sat back. Closing my eyes for the last time...