Just Want To Be Happy

4- If I Dont Have You

I'm so excited but also scared. Since I've moved here I've bumped into Luke and applied to acting class, I've also gotten a new job at a downtown fancy restaurant (bye bye mc Donald's) and to top it all off I had dinner with one of the most genuine guys in this city and now I'm rooming with him. Thinking about this made me miss Jesse back at home but he wanted me to make a choice and I did, where would that leave us if I ever came back home to visit. I would see him walk by me and would he even say anything to me?
( probably not)

Before I keep this going with Luke and I, I need to see if it's 100 & 10% completely over with us. I called him and it rung at least 4 times then he picked up, " hello? Hey Jess it's me, what do you want? I wanted to see if you and I are in fact over, look Sam we had good years together and I was thinking while you left that you don't deserve me, you need someone that is going to make you happy and I tend to tare you down and I've realized that. I see on tv that you and your actor crush Luke from Degrassi are talking and I'm okay and you should be too. As of now you and I are over over." He said what he said and I took it and ran with it.

He was right he had put me in a lot of crap that I didn't want or need, I still love him but since I've been here I'm not In love with him. It makes sense that he feels it too after are history together, I wanted at one point for things to be the same but I know that it will never be when it comes to us. Luckily I have Luke and I only have one day left of my standard class to go before I graduate to class number 2. Once I was done thinking in my head I found Luke making spaghetti and that smell with the garlic bread filled the room and I just walked up beside him, he kissed my forehead " I've been meaning to talk to you about this now so here it is. " I would never try to show favoritism to anyone in my class as you know, no matter how much I have strong feelings for them. With saying that I know you know you had to work just like they all have in class and I'm happy to say that tomorrow you get to graduate with the others also, not to mention the next acting class you will not have to see me since I won't be teaching that class this year and I was hoping with that said will you be my boyfriend?" My jaw dropped in front of me like I was about to pass out but thankfully I didn't. I was so happy and with that happy came me kissing him after saying yes to being his boyfriend.