Meraki

hi, i am anxiety

"hi, i am anxiety. i am your worst enemy and your best friend. i would very much like to make a home out of your body. first, i will build up my fitness by pushing away all those that you love. then, i will pour drops of worry into your eyes. they do not love you, they never have, they never will. they reach out of their shell and poke every piece of you, point out parts that you never noticed were there in the first place.

later, once that is settled, i will make you think one, two, three, four times before saying anything. you must be wrong, you are hurting someone, you are making a fool out of yourself. i will tell you to be quiet, because if you talk: your hands will tremble, your heart will attack itself, you will sweat, your blood will try to come to your face's rescue, in vain. be quiet, love. hush.

and when you are in bed, staring at the wall, i will quiet down everything. your heartbeat, your will to live, your happiness. did she really mean it, when she said that i looked nice? did she? or is she simply pitying you? i will remind you of things you have buried into your mind. you lost your friend because you weren't good enough. you aren't worth being friends with you are annoying. you should just shut up; let me do all the work. do not smile, you look like an idiot. do not laugh, you sound like a donkey. do not voice out your opinion, you will hurt someone and be looked down upon. do cry, my dear. i am here for you.

you love me. you need me. without me, you are nothing. with me, you are nothing. i am who you are. hi, i am anxiety, who are you and why are you in this body of mine?"

to anyone who doesn't understand anxiety. it is the relationship of cinderella and her stepmother.