Broken Hearts

Prologue- frozen words

Snowflakes fall softly from the ashen sky. The clouds cover the sun and leave the world bellow in a depressing gray subject to a cold so bitter it goes right through skin and freezes the bones on impact. That's what it feels like anyway... Few people move about the streets, only when they have no other way to get to their destination, and even then footsteps are fast and silently muffled by the damp snow. I watch the movement all around me to try and distract from the matter at hand... the words that slashed my heart and drove me here sit idly by, crouching in the back ready to pounce at a moment's notice and pull me back into another fit of racking sobs. That's why I have to distract my aching brain.

Above me bare branches cling to the snow falling from the sky. I've been laying on this bench for about thirty minutes now. At least last time I checked. This is one of my favorite spots to go- a little bench half-hidden in a grove of Aspen trees. It's not really a grove... more of a few aspens that happened to grow in a circle with space in the middle, and someone just happened to put a bench in that little spot in the middle of the Aspens that happened to grow in a circle. It isn't really anything special. But it is too me. I guess that is what matters. I remember so many times sitting here- laughing, and smiling ever afternoon of this last summer with her- I feel more tears join the frozen streams already on my face. Funny how, when the mind wanders, it can always return to the same thing... and funny how, that thing that it keeps returning to often causes unbearable, heartbreaking pain.

This world sucks. A lot.   

Any world, any universe in which something like that happens to a girl like her... no.no.no.no.no.no.no I can't think about that. That's why I came here in the first place, but it doesn't seem to be working the way I thought it would. Considering my mind just keeps returning to... that. That one fact. The fact that brought me here.

I swallow hard and turn on the snowy bench, away from the street and the town, so that it is just me and the wood of the bench slowly covering with the snow that escapes the grasp of the tree's branches. As I breath in the scent of old wood, my mind returns to the other fact troubling me. The fact that I did something that I never do... that fact that I lied. My mind continues to disobey my list of things not to think of, so I decide that this is a better thing to think of than thinking of the other thing.

Thirty-three minuets ago I got the worst news of my life. I told my parents I was going to take a nap and not disturb me... then I ran.

I ran and ran until I couldn't anymore. I ran to the only place I could, even if it was a place I came with her, it was one of my favorites. But still, I've never ran away before. This isn't really running away though. I'm not staying here forever or anything... I just... I just... need sometime? That sounds about right. I need some time. But for what? Time won't change anything. Time won't change that horrible, horrible, word.

I sigh heavily and see my breath dancing through the frosty air. This world will always be cold if I can't get through this. I know in my heart I can if I try. I know we can if I try.

Memories flood my mind of just months ago. It's amazing how different life might be now... The memories keep coming and cause me a deep pain that rushes through my body and makes everything numb. I don't even try to stop it anymore. It takes too much effort. So I lay here on this bench, in the bitter cold of October and cry hard as precious memories flood my brain.