My mother wasn't killed in an accident, or didn't drown in an ocean. She didn't contract a terrible disease and suffer. My mother chose her death, unlike many of us. It was her choice, fate didn't decide...she did.
As a child I always awaited her arrival at the front door, leaving my small fingerprints and fogging the glass. Every car that came down our street was like reliving something great. I'd feel myself build with anxiety and hope and then at the climax of me seeing the driver , I'd yell " MAMA!" , only to see a stranger traveling aimlessly.
I realized she was gone when my dad sold our house and out of the emptiness in his heart, burned all the photos of us. He told me, how we were going to live with Minnie, my grandmother and we'd spend hours eating cookies. He promised me all the most impossible things that would ignite burst of excitement in me. However being like a kid, I still had billions of questions. And like the great father he answered as many as he could, except one. Just one.
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Dialogue Finally !
" Hello Ivey, I'm your guidance counselor Mrs. Tempton, and this is your student council president Londynn Bradford." I studied the meek office, and tried to relax. However, the stale coffee on Mrs.Tempton's breath and the judgemental glances by Londynn were making me naseous. Mrs. Tempton opened my manilla folder and began to scan over my personal files. I felt my heart throb in my chest. "Your schedule is pretty challenging this semester but we offer after school tutoring and early morning help if you need it. I see you and Londynn have Anatomy together so that should ease your nerves..." she could tell I was nervous. " We expect you to be here at 8:30 every morning and dismissal is at approximately 4:00. We run a very strict tardy policy here, no exceptions." as she nodded making her glasses ride the bridge of her nose before she positioned them back where they belong. Londynn then cheerfully jumped up and handed me a small gift bag. " Welcome to East Creek High School, we hope you enjoy." And with that, I was handed my schedule and pushed into a swarm of teenagers all rushing to their destinations. My eyes felt teary, as Londynn's blonde pony tail disappeared with the crowd. I wanted everyone to stop, please. But my thoughts were mere sayings , and the crowd moved me like a tide, away from the shore away from security.
