Fighting The Darkness

Prologue

January 17th 2003

It's been two years since I've seen him. Two years since I broke his heart and sent him away.

But then again, he did rape my mother, got her pregnant with twins, (one of which died and was now stuck a newborn forever; the other a spawn of satan) set fire to his mom's boyfriend. Him, not his house. Like Tate actually set someone on fire. (Although since his mother murdered his father for being unfaithful I'd say his demons are hereditary.) And shot up a school. Like, kids he knew.

Yet I missed him.

I miss spending hours in the attic with his brother Beau, (a malformed accident, hushed up) and beating each other at random games. We  talked for hours on end, and when we were apart you could tell we were pining. Since the night I found out he was dead until I sent him away we spent every hour we could together. He got rid of a bully for me - a vicious bitch of a cokewhore who beat me up because I refused to eat my cigarette.
Tate was the only person that would listen too. Mom and dad had their own problems, and I had no friends at school. I was finally happy with him. He made me promise not to hurt myself, and he's the guy I gave my virginity to.

He was also with me when I died.

Despite our closeness I still felt alone. When I found out he shot up a school I was scared. Until then, I thought he was alive. Finding out that your boyfriend was actually dead was a very strange experience.  Then his sister Addie died on halloween and forced to stay on earth. It became very hard to be alone when his sister hovered around.  We started to drift, and I became depressed.

I had gotten ahold of a bottle of pills. I swallowed 28 pills, and Tate only got 7 out when he forced them out. By the time he found me it was already too late.

And he held me while I died, making sure I was surrounded with love. My parents didn't even know I had died. Hell, I didn't even know.

Until Tate showed me my body.

Flies buzzed around it and chunks of flesh had already started to rot. How long had I been there? Days? Weeks?

When I finally looked at him, he was crying. He didn't want me dead. Even if that was the only way we could be together. He wanted me to be able to leave the house, and live my life. He was willing to let me go, only seeing me on halloween, when he got to roam around as he chose.

"I tried to save you. I shoved my fingers down your throat.. only a little came up.. I did everything I could. You died loved. You died knowing that I was right there for you, helping you through it. And I'm so sorry it happened. I would give up everything if you could be alive again. I love you, Violet. "

And then three days later my mom and one of my brothers died in childbirth. My father was killed by Tate and the spirits of the house when he tried to take me away. And then I sent him away.

Two long years have passed since I sent him away. And I have always regretted it. I miss him with all my heart.  I hear him sometimes,  and I know when Hayden tries to trip me he always catches me before I get hurt.

Nora says all I have to do is call him. She says all he's been doing is staring off into space. I don't know what to do. I feel like if he actually wanted to talk to me he'd leave me a note or something. I know he's seen that despite me sending him away I never erased the "I love you" he wrote on my chalkboard.

Is it really that easy?

-Violet