Jim Armstrong and the Goblet's Curse

Prologue

Okay. Let's get the near death experiences started!

Huh. You don't see many stories that start off like that anymore. I call it, 'the attention grabber.' Has your attention been grabbed? Great. Let's do this.

Oh, I'm sorry. I haven't even introduced myself yet. How rude of me. Then again, I'm not known to be the most polite person in the world. Or the most intelligent. Or the most focused. Or the most productive.

Ughh... just thinking about telling this hella long story makes me feel tired. And it's so late anyway... maybe I should just do this tomorrow...

NO! NO, WE ARE DOING THIS NOW. FOCUS JIM!

My name is Jim Armstrong. I'm 11 years old and I live in Sudbury, Ontario. You also don't see a lot of stories that take place in the cold cities of Canada, either. Yeah, well my story is all about new experiences. There are some crazy things in here that you wouldn't see in your normal, everyday life. Then again, I am not normal. Definitely not.

Now, I'm obligated to tell you that everything you read from now on, is absolutely true. This stuff all really did happen to me and my friends, and if you don't believe me, then my words to you are screw you.

Yeah. Definitely not the politest.

Leave now, if you're so simple-minded that you can't believe the truth when it's right in front of you, no matter how bizarre it is. The truth is the truth, and if you can't accept that, then I'm sorry my friend, but I have nothing more to say to you.

But, for those of you that are giving me and this book a chance, I welcome you to my terribly dangerous life.

Have you ever felt like you had the worst luck and life ever? That no matter how much you tried, your day still sucked? Like it'd never get better? Well, this book will sure cheer you up, because my life is a thousand times worse.

Are you ready to feel better about yourself? Good. Am I ready to relive all of this so soon?

Probably not.

Let's do it anyway!

My story starts off a something like this.