My Life Story When I Was 4

"I'd say I'm the strongest"

People always ask me "how come you know a lot of songs that come on the radio?" I tell them because i listen to music all the time,music is my life.
It really is...the real reason i listen to music a lot is because it calms me,makes me feel like all the stuff i went through-all the heart-ache and the tears I've been through, was all in my imagination. But as soon as the music ends,and it's quite;I'm left with my thoughts.
I often think about how life would be if i were to be born in a different family or if my family would care if i just decided to end my life. Would they miss me? Would they even notice I'm gone before it's too late? I personally don't think so,because they can't even tell if I'm upset.
I've been through so much in my life before i even had the chance to go through puberty. my dad left me and my siblings when i was 4.he left with my so-called god mother and her kids. i remember that night like it was yesterday. That very morning after, my mom almost bled to death and was rushed to the hospital. She was cleaning our glass table and it fell on her foot. I was in my room when it happened,so when i heard a crash it sounded like a metal pan hitting the floor. As i went to go see what happened i saw a trail of blood going from the kitchen to the front door. My mom was sitting on the chair we keep outside with a rag on he foot. She looked like she was gonna pass out. I had to call the police but we didn't have a phone so i had to go to my neighbors (who were also my friends parents) and use their phone. me and my brothers stayed with them until my dad came home. When my mom came back from the hospital, she had to get stitches and was wearing a cast. When my dad came back later that night they got into a huge fight and my mom bashed the windshield of my dads old Cadillac . Me and my older brother used to play in it because it was broken down in our law. When my dad went MIA for a while,my mom became depressed and didn't want to eat. So i was the temporary mom. i had stopped going to school for a little while to take care if my brothers. My older brother has schizophrenia and my other brother was only a few months old. I had to make sure all of the were fed and taken care of(need i remind you,i was only 4 when all this happened) along with myself and my mom. Soon my grandma came and we moved in with her for help.
A lot has happened since then and i became depressed for a while. I grew up to quickly to help my family. I never really had the chance to be a kid. Once my parents were divorced, there was a lot of conflict happening with my mom's side if the family that made us no longer be in touch with them. After a while i got so tired of it all and moved to Georgia to live with my aunt. I moved so much when i was with my family that it was interfering with my education. I HATED when i would get bad grades on my report card. But i always managed to stay with an A,B honor role. I ended up moving with my aunt to get away from all the moving.
Through out all of my horrible past. music has made me who i am today. A strong person with a kind heart that always looks for the good in the bad. I'm a positive person,but sometimes i let my bad thoughts consume the good ones and i end up being in a bad mood. But just listening to music calms me,and that's when i know that I'll be okay. "God gives it's toughest battles to his strongest soldiers." And from what I've been through, i'd say I'm one of his strongest.