I Hate ( loving) You

14

Louis couldn't stop the tears from falling down his face. He cried and cried, tears of anger and shame and regret. How could he have ever been so stupid, to have expected Harry to love him back?

He cried until he didn't know why he was crying anymore, until there were no tears left in his eyes. Only then did he finally stop and wipe his eyes with the corner of his sleeve.

He leaned against the wall of the bathroom stall, taking a deep breath to clear his thoughts, but it was no use. Every sentence and every word Harry had said was still burned in the back of his mind.

"You were nothing to me."

"You were nothing but a good fuck, and now, I found someone new. Someone better."

It was the truth, after all. Harry didn't love him. Harry didn't love anyone. He'd used Louis and then tossed him aside when he was done, like all the others before him.

Louis didn't know why it hurt him so much. Harry had only confirmed what Louis had known from the very start.

And yet, there suddenly was a gaping hole in Louis' chest where his heart should be.

He deserved it, he told himself. It was his own mistake, for being so naïve as to think that maybe there was something more between them, that maybe Harry was so much more than he let on.

He should have known it would end this way.

Louis sighed, dropping his arms down by his sides. It was too late now. It was over. And he really didn't want to think about this anymore. He just wanted to go home and curl up in his bed and not have to face the world.

And that was when he remembered-he'd left all his things back at Harry's place. And he sure as hell didn't want to go back there ever again.

Louis groaned, pulling his phone out of his pocket and dialing before he could even think things through.

After a minute or so, Zayn finally picked up. "Hey, what's up?"

For a moment, Louis thought of hanging up; it struck him, how utterly childish he was being. The least he could do was go back, pack up his things and at least thank Liam and Niall for letting him stay.

But the very thought of seeing Harry with that girl, that girl he would probably forget the name of the very next day when she walked out the door, made Louis sick to his stomach.

So he took a deep breath. "Zayn...I need you to do me a favour."

"What is it, Lou? Are you alright?" Zayn must've sensed that something was wrong, because he suddenly sounded worried.

"I'm fine," Louis lied, not wanting to get into this right now. Zayn would find out sooner or later, anyways. As much as Louis wanted not to tell Zayn about the situation, he and Zayn simply didn't keep secrets from each other.

Zayn understood. "Alright, then. What is it?"

"Where are you right now?"

Zayn paused for a moment. "Out with Liam. Why?"

"I need you to go back to Harry's place and pack up my things for me. I'm, uh, moving out."

"Oh." Louis could practically sense the questions ready to be asked on the tip of Zayn's tongue. But the one he chose to ask was, "Do you...do you need me to go with you?"

Louis shook his head. "I'm fine, Zayn. I just-I think I need to be alone right now," he lied. Louis wasn't an idiot; he knew Zayn would much rather be with Liam. Just because things with Harry hadn't worked out, it didn't mean that Zayn and Liam's relationship had to suffer from it.