Exaggeration in Moderation

This is an emergency!

Ah, yes... 3rd grade. It includes some of my favorite memories. However, my favorite one was when my teacher spilled coffee on her shirt... I know, it sounds boring, but there's more to it. Alright, let's begin.

It was some random day in 3rd grade. I don't remember the date specifically, they all felt the same. On this day though, a glorious disaster occurred! One that still makes me smirk evilly when I think about it!

(Let's call my teacher 'Mrs. Garbanzo' to save herself from embarrassment.) Now, Mrs. Garbanzo was sitting at the back table boasting about her new white, lace shirt while sipping her coffee. I was sitting in the back of the class room, scribbling on paper pretending to do work, predicting that something bad would happen.

In the next 4 seconds, I hear a gasp and a mumble of angry words from my teacher. I look up from my bad excuse of work to see my teacher staring wide eyed at a large coffee mark on her new white shirt. She grabbed her weird stain-remover pen and started jabbing the crap out of the mark, hoping it would make some difference.

But it didn't. It made the coffee spread.

She started babbling random words while looking for something to clean her shirt. After looking for like 2 seconds for something to remove it with, she looked frantically around the room and stopped when she saw me, the only kid not doing work. She pointed to me saying "Grace! Run to the restroom and bring me a bunch of paper towels! Put a little bit of water on them, too! Go!"

So I slowly got up from my chair and walked over to the door, taking all the time in the world. (I know, I know. I'm a rude little fart. But whatever.) As I was casually walking out of the door to the restroom, I hear my teacher yell "Grace! Hurry! This is an EMERGENCY!"

I thought,'What type of emergency is this?! Remember when I had to pee really bad but you wouldn't let me go to the bathroom and I (kinda) peed my pants? That was an emergency!'

That just made me more upset, so I walked even slower to the bathroom, making sure I let that dark coffee seep into her white shirt.

Once I got to the bathroom, I slowly pulled out a paper towel but shook my head when I realized the bottom wasn't straight enough from the last use. So I discarded that piece and slowly pulled out another piece. Nope. Not good enough.

So I pulled out another piece, and another piece, and another piece until I had a couple perfect pieces. They were beautiful! I began to walk out when I remembered that she wanted them damp. I walked over to the sink and put some water on one. But it was too much water! So I threw away that wet paper towel and tried again. Nope. Too wet. So I tried again and again and again until I got one perfect one!

I walked back to the classroom and slowly gave the single paper towel to my teacher, who glared at me for bringing her just one. But it was a perfect one, so whatever!

Needless to say, about 35 minutes of scrubbing with a paper towel that wasn't even damp anymore didn't get the stain out. But you know what did get out?

My anger towards her for not letting me pee.