Valєríє (The Weeknd Fan-Fic)

she is his lonely star

Valerie:

I woke up with the cold floor beneath me, a patron bottle in my hand, and Matt laying between my legs. My dress was above my hips, and my shoes on the other side of Ari who laid beside me. My head pounded at the thought of what happened last night, but I managed to put up a smile. I know I had fun. The most fun I have had in years. I forgot all about my troubles, something I've been meaning to do for awhile. I got up, waking Matt up from his slumber. I made it upstairs without slipping on anything. Erik was nowhere to be found, which meant I had the house to myself. I went up to the bathroom and pryed the clothes off me that smelled of sweat, alcohol, and sweat. I hopped in the shower, scrubbing away any filthiness that was on my body. But unfortunately I was not able to scrub away the filth inside me. I thought more of what made me this way. I blame the people who try to love me, yet I protect the people who hurt me. A tear falls out my eyes ... Or was it the water dripping down my face? I washed my hair and finished washing up my body before exiting the shower and sitting on the tub for what seemed like hours.

I wish I was Amber. Not feel. Just fuck and go. But I needed someone to care for me because no one ever cared for me. Was I becoming like my mother? Fucking someone in order to keep them in order to feel special about myself? Giving into their needs in order to keep them happy so I won't suffer their lost? I mentally nodded, wiping away the tears knowing that's what I was doing. And the only way to bottle it all up, is to take from Satan himself. Drugs and alcohol.

When my skin was looking like it could turn into a prune any minute, I got out, and dried myself and my hair. I walked to my room and put on some underwear and a bra, along with a pair of leggings, a blue t-shirt, and my combat boots. I left my hair down, wanting it to take away the roundness of my face. I went to Erik's room, and grabbed one of his luggages.

I went back to my room, and stuffed the clothes from my garbage bag and the clothes I had stored here in the luggage. I grabbed my phone, and clicked on Abel.

He didn't pick up which is what I wanted. I didn't want to hear him. If I did I would only break down and tell all to him. But I was strong, and needed to learn how to feel nothing.

"Please leave your voicemail after the tone."

"It's me ... Valerie. Don't freak out, that's the last thing I need you to do ... You know I was never good at explaining myself and I won't start now. Especially not now. I just wanted to let you guys know that I'm on my own now. I don't need any more assistance in this fucked up life of mine. I don't know where I'm going, but I do know whatever path comes to me, I'll take. Let the wrong path come to me if it must. One day I hope you still remember me, and you won't regret this poor ... poor soul like the tattoos I have. We all know that I belong only to you, and I wait for you no matter what. I'm beautiful just for you. My true self exists only for you. I'm your lonely star Abel. Only yours ..."

I hanged up, wiping away the tears that formed in my eyes that I took no notice in before. I grabbed my luggage, and took $3000 from Erik's drawer. I hopped into Javon's car and drove to the airport.

--

"Where will you be going ma'am?"

"What's the next flight out of here?"

"California."

"Then California I go."

She handed me my ticket, and I boarded the plane immediately. We were off before I even knew it. I looked out the window, the city of Toronto now below me. Oh how beautiful it looked, the snowflakes falling on top of it. How beautiful the city looked. If only people knew the pain it brought to me.

I was soon taken over by slumber, the slight movement of the plane making it so.

I'm his lonely star ... I exist ... only for him ...

~~

Guys. It's done.

Thanks so much for reading, I really appreciate it.

#XOTWOD

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