if you hadn't noticed already, i am a king. a beautiful, important, and very superior king.
my throne is checkout 1 and my palace is one of the target branches in seattle i'm co-co manager at. it's a position, i swear.
athough i have a few annoying employees, such as calum. and my god, you know that person that you always either want to yell "shut the fuck up" at or sock them in their beautiful, button nose and make it look like a squash, that's taylor. she's pretty and all, but i don't touch lady parts. too much moisture.
i think i dated her in like third grade, but if i did, it's something i eternally regret because her voice sounds like a dog whistle every time she approaches me to talk about her eyelash extentions that apparently come from a beaver.
anyways, i am very widely loved, as i'm sure my employees are to agree. i'm witty and gorgeous as well as funny and desirable and i've even heard that i'm as handsome as that one old man actor you were secretly attracted to as a kid but thought it was weird because he was old and resembled your dad. (for me it was richard gere)
now, i do not like change and when that rat faced asshole walked through the doors i instantly hated his curly haired guts.
- harry's arrival, prior -
"who in god's name is that fine piece of exclusively holy spirit carved, tom ford model ass is that?" i smoothly rolled up to liam. he was the only other gay guy at the store. and i pretty much hated all of the girls, the only cool one was cara. cara is in class right now (her freshman semester recently started, my senior year of high school starts in a few days.)
"busy." liam mumbled as he studied the stupid magazine he was reading. it was tearing his attention away from the once in a lifetime experience to see an actual attractive human being in the supermarket.
"liam." i whined and tore at his bright red apron until he looked up. "god louis, what the- oh my god."
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"i know." i whispered dreamily as i leaned on his defined shoulder and studied the man. he was wearing black jeans and a navy blue button up with white hearts that went all the way around his neck. he looked confused, he also had a pink paper in his hand which looked like the ones we used for resume's. "well.. i better, you know. take a break from all this.."
"me too." liam speaks just as slowly. "i need to... wash my.. hands." he says the last part in a questionable tone.
"if you're going to try and steal my future husband you can at least make your excuse to talk to him believable, my god. i thought i raised you better." i push liam over and he crashes into the side of the checkout counter before i bolt to the glorious kid.
"can i help you, cutie?" i say boldly. might as well get to the point and if he's not into it whatever. on to the next, as always.
his neck turns to face me. he has to look down to meet my gaze. when he notices this he smiles briefly, almost fond of my size. i don't get that a lot, i usually just get called twink, which isn't a bad thing. submission can be very, very sexy.
"yeah, i'm here for an interview." he says leaning against the wall, in the prettiest rasp i've ever heard, the smirk still on his pink lips.
also, BRITISH????!!!!!
"i'll take you there." i smile, playing it cool, and lead him into the office.
-
after about thirty minutes of swooning to liam about this kids eyes i decided it was time for me to pee. i'd been so busy talking about the new kid to remember that i had a bladder. an overflowing bladder.
i walked through the aisles until i reached the employees lounge which contained lots and lots of alcohol, mainly because most of the employees here were college students, ashton, our manager, had no idea about the stash though.
it wasn't because he wasn't allowed in there, because he was. everybody just hated his ass so we made him feel alienated enough to know he can't hang out with us. anytime. he randomly stops by and let's us know about stupid work things that nobody cares about and cracks a dumb joke, but thats about it.
his squeaky voice, preppy words, and annoyingly white teeth were enough to put me off alone. and to think, i thought he was hot when he interviewed me. it disgusted me to think about now.
actually, if i'm being honest i'd probably have sex with him. curly hair is a kink of mine, i'd say.
i pushed the tan stall open and there the new kid was, standing with his pants on the floor, ghost white ass out in the open, free for the breeze to take a trip in his crack.
"oh." he looks back with a blush on his cheeks and his flow of pee stops. i just nodded and stood in the stall two over from him. there was a lot of silence, which i didn't like. i like to talk, no matter the circumstances, nothing is off limits.
"how'd it go?" i turn my neck his way. yeah, its weird he pulls his pants all the way down when he pees but he's still hot. and at least now i can brag to liam about seeing his godly thighs.
he has an okay butt, but don't we all? i'm not too much of a butt guy anyway. thighs and abs are my preferance. although, if you're hot enough my preferences can easily change.
what i'm trying to say is i'm kind of a whore.
"huh?" he turns all the way around to face me. may i remind you, there is still piss coming out if his penis and he just turned his front my direction.
he. peed. on. me.
all. OVER. ME.
"what the hell?!" i screamed. he just peed all over my clothes. PEED.
"oops!" he says frantically, cheeks tomato red as he pulls up his boxers and black skinny jeans.
"i can't fucking believe- what are you doing!?" he starts rubbing paper towels all over me, my shirt, my pants, right on my crotch. i wouldn't be complaining if he hadn't just peed on me, but he did. he literally just peed on me. "don't rub it in!"
"i- i- i don't know- what- to- to-" he mumbles scrambling for something, i'm not sure what. probably scrambling to find his tongue because he's stuttering like an idiot.
he seems like kind if an idiot, actually, so i'm not surprised.
"do you realize how much a gay man's clothes mean to him?" i look at him straight in the eyes as if he should definitely know the answer to this question, and if he doesn't i'll immediately assume that he's an imbecile.
"you're gay?" he asks.
i don't respond and roll my eyes before leaving the bathroom to go change my clothes.
heyyy. it me. do you think i should fix the capitalization to improve the story? idk if i should correct the punctuation on this story. i'm not sure if i like lowercase better so comment here what you prefer!
