In the Moment//Ed Sheeran

T.E.N

Ed

Early August, 2007

Beth couldn't even look into my eyes as she prepared to tell me goodbye. I was still in the clothes as the day before, and I wanted to shower, but I wanted ft her to stay even more. Her parents had packed up the last bit of their belongings and we'd getting ready to drive to the airport. "You'll call?" I asked her.

"As often as I can, yes." She nodded. I reached out and cupped her face. She kissed my palms and held her hand over mine. "I love you."

"Come back to me, Beth." I tell her. "Come back when you're older. So we can live in that little apartment you told me about. And have a bookshelf the covers the entire wall. A little garden on the balcony."

She laughed, but it was twisted up with a sob as well. "We're teenagers, Ed." She reminded me. "In three months we'll have forgotten about each other. We'll get older, and it will have just become a distant memory."

I turned her face towards me. "No. Stop it. Look at me, Beth. I'm going to find you again and we're going to be together. You love me don't you?"

"More than anything." She nodded.

"I want you to write me too." Her tears wetted my hands. All the crying we had been doing, I was surprised that we didn't fall over from dehydration. Her eyes were dimmed red, and her eyelashes were stuck together. "And send me pictures so can hang them on my wall so I'll never forget what you look like."

Beth wrapped her arms around my shoulder and pressed her face into my neck. "Even if you fall in love with someone else, don't forget me."

"Stop talking like that." I say, another wave of crippling pain coming over me.

"Don't forget me, okay?"

I kissed her hair as her dad decides that time was up. He touched her shoulder and she responded by holding on to me tighter than before, strangling me. "It won't be forever." I murmured.

"Yes it will!" She wailed. "I'm never goi to se e you again!"

I pulled her away and kissed we cheek. "Yes you will, you'll see." I say. I'm not even sure, but sometimes a lie hurts a lot less than the truth. "Goodbye, Bethany."

She sniffled and her dad wrapped his arms around her shoulder and pulled her towards the family car. Her small, purple beetle Had been towed away and was probably going to be put on a ferry to be shipped to wherever they were going next. Maybe she wouldn't see her purple car again just as I would most likely never see her again. He dad helped et in and shut the door.

I kept my distance, because I knew if I got close than we would start all over again, and it hurt so much that I just wanted it to be over. Mr. And Mrs. Cartwright both gave me apologetic stares and I simply nodded, understanding that at this point there was nothing to do.

They climbed into the car. I saw Bethany's face peeking at me though the rear windshield. I couldn't stand it anymore. I turned and grabbed my bike, feeling my heart tearing a million different ways in a million different places. I climbed onto my bike and began to pedal away as fast as I could. Away from her house, away from the pain, and away from her. My eyes burned with hot, lava like tears as I sped away.

I didn't stop until I was at the corner store at which me and Beth visited a few times for junk food. I went to the fridge and pulled out three packages of eggs and set them in the counter.
The cashier didn't even think twice before ringing them up. I gave her the money as he handed me back my change and I took off without another word. I climbed back on my bike, using one hand to steer and another to cradle the eggs in my lap.

Once I was at Mina's house, I dropped my bike onto their lawn and opened up the package of eggs. I began to bombard their once nice blue home with eggs, each one landing with a solid thud against the panels.

Mina opened the door and looked around, still dressed in her pajamas. "What the hell are you doing?" She cried.

I continued to throw the eggs at her house until her dad showed up behind her. "Hey, you little bastard!" He screamed. I grabbed the second carton and simply flung the whole thing, not caring where I left it.

I jumped on my bike and began to pedal, pumping my legs as hard as I could. "That's for Beth!" I shouted over the wind. "That's for Bethany!"

That's for Beth, I think, my heart slamming in my ears. That's for Bethany.

Mid August

Two weeks after Beth left, I was still mourning her. Summer was nearly over and I was still trying to decide what to do with y time besides mope about in my room. I sat wondering when she would call me, but more than that, I wondered if she actually existed at all.

I went by to check on her garden frequently. I wasn't surprised to show up there one day and find everything trashed. The flowers had been ripped from their Ed's, and there was graffiti all over the fence. This struck a nerve for some reason, and it made everything all the much worse. I figured it was Mina and probably Darlene and Rochelle. They all had it out for Beth for no reason whatsoever. Except for Mina, who has somewhat of a reason to hate her and me as well.

Jessie came by later that week after the garden was wrecked. I opened the door and glared at him. "Hey, Ed, are you okay? We haven't seen you in a while and everyone was worried about you. I mean, I haven't seen you in a while either."

"Did you wreck Beth'a garden?" I asked, not even wasting my time on his conversation.

"What garden?"

"Beth's garden in her back fucking yard!" I shouted at him. He recoiled and stepped back, flinching away from me.

"Are you okay man?" Jessie asked. I stepped back and slammed the door in his face. Even if he didn't do it, I hated him. That garden was all I had left d her and now it was ruined. Everything I had that was Beth related was all in my head, probably where it would stay forever.

Early September

Beth still hadn't called a whole month later and I was thinking that she was gone forever. She had grown into my life like a spring flower and died with the fall. Maybe that was the way love was suppose to be, true love at least. I found that hard to believe, however.

Suffolk had nothing to offer anymore, I decided. I decided that it strangled me, like a tight rope around my neck, pulling the life right from me. All I wanted was to go out and see the world and find myself without all the past memories ruining all my new ones. My mother didn't want to let me leave, but as you probably know, I did anyways.

Before I did, however, I went to the beach one last time to recap on my life here. Thinking I was in love with Mina, knowing I was in love with Beth. The bonfire here almost three months ago where j saw her for the first time. Her hair parted straight down the middle. The flower that was resting behind her ear.

The water moved sluggishly as the cold weather forced it to half freeze. I walked around, knowing that I had to get going toon. I walked back up to the road as my shoe caught on something, nearly making me trip. I reached down and picked up a familiar book, dogeared and worn down greatly. There was sand between every page and I dusted it off. I flipped open the front page and found Bethany's name written in swirling cursive.

Suddenly that guitar riff, the swirling memories, and the mismatched lyrics I had been going over came together in a song I put on my album, sever years later.