Cosplay Husband

6. Trigger Warning

EREN: "I'm bored," I said, "I already finished all the books."

I tossed the bouncy ball at the wall and watched it ricochet back to my hand.

"I'm busy sewing right now," Armin said. His lemony hair was tied back into a bun. I wanted to poke it.

"Fine. What's your favorite food?"

"Umm...cookies. Snickerdoodles, mostly, because they have a fun name."

"Favorite music?"

"I'm not really picky about what I listen to."

"Favorite color?"

"Blue or green."

"Favorite place when you were younger?"

"The library."

"Nerd." I scoffed.

"Fine, what about you?"

"I don't have a favorite place."

"Fair enough." Armin shrugged. "Ask me something more interesting."

"When did you get your first kiss?" I decided.

He stopped pushing the fabric under the sewing machine and turned the machine off. He shifted to face me.

"I was twelve..." He mumbled.

"Twelve? I didn't get my first kiss until Mikasa--but, don't tell anyone." I said. I noticed the darkness on his face. "How did you get your first kiss?"

He didn't answer, and he wouldn't meet my eyes. Pieces of hair that had fallen out of his bun framed his face.

"Armin...?"

"My cousin...she said nobody would believe me if I told anyone, but...when I was twelve and she was nineteen, we were at a family reunion when she sexually assaulted me. She said even if I told someone, they wouldn't believe me because boys can't get sexually assaulted." He said, clenching his fist until his knuckles were white.

"Armin..." I mumbled.

"She only touched me, but it still scared me. The room had been the darkest room I'd ever known, and her hands were the dirtiest." He continued. "When it was over, she left with her twenty-four-year old boyfriend and I haven't seen her since."

I admit that I would've immediately believed boys couldn't get raped, but I couldn't look Armin in the eyes and still believe that.

"I don't know how I ended up able to like all genders, since a person of one gender did something so horrible to me. I guess I do lean toward boys more, but that's not the point. I find it hard to believe anyone could like me because she said that I was ugly the entire time, and that the only person who would do anything like that to me was her."

A tiny dark spot appeared on his jeans, and I realized it was a tear that had dropped onto his leg.

"Armin..." I mumbled again, leaning forward and throwing my arms around him. "I'm sorry I asked."

"It's okay. But I hate it that she stole my first kiss." He said, rubbing his eyes.

"She doesn't have to be your first kiss. A first kiss is something that you're supposed to enjoy with someone you like." I said.

"But--"

I grabbed his shoulders and made sure he was looking at me directly.

"If Mikasa taught me anything, it's that virginity is nothing but a concept. I would say the same about kissing: it doesn't count unless you want it to count. And getting your first kiss stolen shouldn't count." I said.

"Eren..." He murmured.

I noticed my gaze darted between his eyes and his lips. He didn't like me that way and vice versa, so I would just end up stealing another kiss from him.

Then, he mumbled something to me. Despite how close we were, I still couldn't hear him, but I knew he had spoken because I saw his lips move slightly.

"What?"

"C-can I kiss you?" His face reddened.

My face also turned red. "Me? Why? I'm straight."

"I know, but I'm not. And...I kinda like you. But like, as slightly more than a friend."

"Are you confessing to me?"

"N-not really. Just...it doesn't have to be my first kiss, just a test kiss to see if I'm actually any good." Armin explained.

"Uh...I guess...." I said.

He leaned forward and bumped his lips into mine clumsily.

"Oh...guess I'm not very good." He mumbled.

"No, it's okay. Here, let me..." I cupped his face and tilted it slightly, pressing my lips against his for a few seconds.

When I pulled away, I failed to see what I had done as wrong.

But I assumed we'd never speak of it again.