Reality? No Thanks.

What Would A Serial Killer Say?

Suddenly, the ground began to shake. Sydney yelped and jumped up from her spot on the ground. A loud banging sound came from where she was sitting, as if someone was pounding on the floorboards. With one final blow, the ground flipped open and Sydney realized that she had been sitting on something like a trap door. A guy's head popped up from the door. It kind of looked like a gopher coming up from a patch of dirt.
"Hello!" He said. "Are you a serial killer?"
Sydney shrugged. "Not that I know of."
"What are you doing?!" Somebody hissed from under the door. "There could be a... you know." The guy rolled his eyes and looked down.
"Relax. She said she's not a serial killer."
"That's exactly what a serial killer would say!" Sydney recognized the voice to be a girl's.
"Which is why she's not a serial killer! Why would a serial killer say exactly what a serial killer would say? They would say the opposite! I mean, unless they wanted us to know that they were a serial killer. Which is just stupid." Sydney nodded in agreement.
"What?" The girl replied, dumbfounded.
The guy just sighed jumped down from the ladder to let Sydney climb down. Once she had set the ladder back into it's place in the ceiling she took a look at the girl. She was small and delicate-looking with dirty blonde hair and sharp hazel eyes. She looked to be around 18. She stood defensively, protecting herself from Sydney by shielding her face with her fists; though Sydney knew that she could easily push past her or knock her over if she wanted to.
The guy was tall and had curly, short hair with matching dark brown eyes; he looked to be a year or two younger than Sydney, though he still towered over her. He leaned against a wall and watched the girls excitedly, as if expecting them to fight. When all they did was stare at each other for an awkward thirty six seconds, he gave up hope and pushed away from the wall.
"Nice to meet you, random person number eight!" He said to Sydney. "I'm Mason. I like waffles. This is Alexa, she likes-" He paused and thought for a moment. "Well... uh... nothing I guess." He gestured to the girl, still glaring at Sydney through her arms. "Don't worry, she was like that when I met her, too- a real downer."
"Hey!" Alexa shouted at him. He smirked.
"I'm Sydney. I like pancakes. I don't like Alexa." She introduced herself.
"Hey!"
"Hay is for horses!" Mason corrected her. "So where should I put the soy milk?" He asked Sydney. She smothered a smile.
"Hang it from the ceiling, next to the potato." She answered. They shared a knowing look.
"What? What the heck does that mean? And why do you keep asking people that?" Alexa lowered her arms and dropped her stance.
"Yes." Sydney told her. Mason had basically just asked her if she was a dream person, and she had answered yes. It was a secret saying that all dream people knew, so they could tell who lived in their realm and who didn't. The other girl was obviously a dreamer, a person from the horrifying, 'reality realm.' Which meant that this was her nightmare; not Sydney's, like she had feared. Unless it was a rare shared nightmare, where there are two dreamers are in the same place at the same time. Sydney could still die in this nightmare, especially because it wasn't a lucid dream for her. Blah blah blah, blah blah blah blah. Alexa rolled her eyes.
"Whatever. You people are crazy."
Bang!
The girls jumped. Mason frowned and they all turned to a rusty steel door at the end of the dim hallway they were in.
Bang! Bang!
The door shook and Alexa screamed.
"No! No please not again!"
BANG! BANG! BANG!
"Alexa?" Mason yelled over the noise. "What is that?" In response, she took off running in the opposite direction of the door. Sydney sighed and watched as the hallway grew longer and longer in front of Alexa. There was no use running.
"Are you doing that?" She asked. Mason nodded, concentrating on growing the hallway. That meant that this was a lucid dream for him, he could control everything.
BANG! BANG!
Alexa finally reached the end of the hallway and slammed into the wall just as the door faded away.
"Okay, I have an idea." Mason teleported her next to him. "Here, let's all just calm down, have some waffles, and then you can tell us what is trying to kill us." He handed both girls a plate of waffles with butter on the top. Sydney shoved her face into it, trying to swallow it whole. Alexa broke down crying.
BANG! BANG! BANG!
Suddenly, the door busted open and a cloud of dust flew up from the ground. A dark ominous figure stood in the doorway.
Sydney looked up from her plate, "Are you kidding me?"
"That's your worst fear?" A new stack of waffles appeared on Mason's plate.
"Noooooooooooooooooooo!" Alexa crumpled into a miserable heap on the ground.

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Should I leave this chapter here? At a cliff hanger? Hmmm...
Nah, I kind of hate Alexa.
Alright. Let's kill her.
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The mysterious figure in the doorway stepped into the light.
"Hey kids! Who's ready to have a fun time with everyone's favorite dinosaur?"
"Nooooooo! Just leave me alone you stupid prehistoric freak!" Alexa threw her plate of waffles at the... whatever that creepy thing really is. The thing caught the plate in the air with it's razor sharp teeth and gulped it down.
"You can't escape me Alexa!" It said in a cheerful voice. Alexa continued to have a mental breakdown and Mason passed Sydney some popcorn. The purple dinosaur began slowly making its way to Alexa. Each step shook the entire building.
"It this episode we are going to learn about how to eat people! Doesn't that sound fun, kids?"
"Yeah!" Sydney cheered.
"What are you doing?" Alexa shouted at her. "Don't just stand there you idiot, help me!" Sydney pretended to consider it.
She shrugged,"Nah, I don't really feel like it. I'd rather finish this popcorn. Mmm... it's sooo good. Do you want some?"
"Do I want some?" Alexa sneered. "Do I want some?!"
"Shh!" Mason said. "This is my favorite part." Alexa looked up to see that the terrifying dinosaur was now towering over her. She jumped to her feet and ran out of the hallway without slamming into a wall this time.
Good for her.
The purple guy very slowly started to stomp down the hallway to follow her.
"Oh, come on! Do you want to eat her or not?" Mason asked it. "She's probably all the way to the front door by now!"
"I do..." The thing answered.
"Then you need to be faster than that!" Sydney chastised.
"I'm trying my best." It hung it's head in shame.
Sydney put her hands on her hips. "Well if you can't catch her, then I guess we'll just have to trap her. Mason?" He nodded at her and they were all teleported back to the attic. Alexa happened to be running for her life at the time, and unaware of the change in scenery, she slammed into a wall. Again. She bounced back and fell right into someone's arms.
"Hello again Alexa! Ready to die?" Alexa screeched. Sydney and Mason munched on their popcorn and in between mouthfuls shouted,
"Sacrifice! Sacrifice! SACRIFICE!"

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Well that got dark fast.
Okay okay, before you go thinking that I'm a lunatic who likes sacrificing people to dinosaurs, just know that she didn't actually die. That was just Alexa's nightmare. Before she experiences any pain she'll wake up in the middle of the night perfectly fine.
...But she deserved it.