13 days it's been. 13 days since I last saw Joe's face. 13 days since I've heard his voice. 13 days since I last felt his presence light up the room. And they've been the most grueling days as well.
Every other feeling besides sadness has once again become foreign to me. Only tears plague the happy me that Joe started to bring back, and now the process starts all over again. I guess when people say 'Life isn't fair' they truly mean it.
Caspar and I have become inseparable. We're always by each others side, always there to comfort one another. We've left the apartment like twice in the past 13 days. The first time was to get food, and the second time was to meet up with Alfie and Zoe to discuss our plan of action. That didn't go to well...
It ended in Zoe having a panic attack and me storming out of their apartment. I didn't talk during the whole discussion because I have no clue what to do at this moment in time. All my mind is allowing me to do is listen.
"Hey, Harlow? Would you like to go get some breakfast?" Caspar asks me softly.
"No," I reply.
"C'mon, you heard what Alfie said. We have to go on with our lives because then Luke may give us Joe back," When I don't answer Caspar breaks the silence by saying, "Lo?".
I wince at that nickname nowadays, for Joe's the one who made it for me. We were in his kitchen when he did, it was the first day I met him too. Then, that nickname gave me butterflies, but now, it feels like someone is stabbing me in the heart.
"But what if that doesn't work?" I sigh, turning to face Casp.
"We won't know unless we try," Caspar shrugs. He's got a point.
"Let me get dressed first then," I respond and a ghost of a smile appears on his face.
When I step into my apartment I immediately feel a chill in the air. I haven't stepped foot in here since Joe's disappearance, only because I wanted to be close to Caspar. The once Lively apartment looks so vacant, and dark.
I scuffle my feet up the stairs and look at my deserted closet. Caspar had come in here to grab me some clothes a couple days ago. He was worried that I'd just stay in the same thing forever... I honestly wouldn't mind that.
My fingertips found their way to a red plaid flannel that said 'idiot' in the back, props to 5sos. I then slipped into some black leggings, a white tight fitted long sleeve and put the flannel on for warmth. After doing that, I grabbed my black converse and looked at myself in the mirror, sighing at my under eye circles.
I debated on whether or not putting makeup on, it wouldn't hurt... Plus, I love doing makeup. My hands quickly grab my makeup bag and go through a shortened version of my makeup routine. Concealer, powder, eyeliner, mascara.
"Caspar?" I call out into his apartment when I finish. My eyes dart to the glass shards scattered all across the kitchen floor. "Fück," I curse to myself, lifting my hands over my mouth.
I tiptoe across the floor and see no sign of life. Please, let Caspar still be here. My eyes widen when I notice a red liquid also on the floor. Screams immediately escape my mouth.
"Wh-What!" A voice sounds from behind me and I turn to see Caspar. I gasp and run to hug him.
"Are you okay?" He asks, seeming to be out of breath.
"I-I thought they took you too," I sigh into his chest.
"No, it okay. I just spilled a glass of cranberry juice," he says soothingly into my ear. I let out a small giggle and can tell he's surprised to hear it.
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That Youtuber Next Door (Joe Sugg Fanficton)
FanfictionFor every good thing that happens to me, there's a bad one to follow. It's my fault that Joe's gone. It's all my fault. What have I done?