X's in O's

X's and O's

I kept telling my dad that I didn't want to move, and part of me didn't. The part that wanted to stay safely in the house that I had grown up in, with the same friends that understood me, and the same town that had taken me in since I was born. But then again, there was a part of me that wanted adventure that wanted to move. To see how people reacted to me, who took me in, or didn't; and see if someone...if anyone, could relate to me. You know, go to a new school and meet some dark, mysterious, good looking guy that understood me.

Ha, oh please a 'dark mysterious stranger', how cliche was that? Yeah I'm just going to walk into school and bump into some really hansom guy that immediately falls for me but is too secretive to tell me. Way to be realistic. It would probably go more like, walk into school some how piss off the mean girl by stepping on 'her' floor tile or something and spend the rest of the year living in utter terror of the next public confrontation that was sure to come my way.

Not that I would ever tell ANYONE that some part of me actually wanted to move, I would resist it as long and as much as I could. For some reason the absolute last thing I wanted was for someone to figure me out, to point out that I did want to move. Course, if anyone did then I would deny it with every fiber of my being...after all I've gotten pretty good at lying lately. No dad I don't mind if you go out and leave me alone for the sixth night in a row. Sure, go spend time with your girlfriend, I don't mind. I'm fine. Always fine. Never great, happy, amazing, awful, terrible, or completely depressed. I'm. Just. Fine. That was my biggest lie of my life, and I said it every day.

I heard foot steps and looked up from my book to see my dad leaning against the door frame, taking one of my head phones out I raised a questioning eyebrow at him. "Can we talk?" he asked gently.

Unwillingly I pulled out my other head phone and paused my music. Putting my best front forward I tried to be civil, "What about?" Person whose ruining my life.

"Well about the move." I inwardly groaned, ugh, it was bad enough that I had my own consious breathing down my neck about this now him too! I was so sick of this subject!

"Yeah? I know we're leaving in three days, what else do I need to know?" We were moving from small town of Union City, Indiana, all the way to Vancouver, Washington.

"Well I just wanted to get the it strait why we are moving there."

Was he trying to tick me off? We have had this conversation, like, fifteen times before! "I already know because you've already told me....multiple times." I snapped.

"Excuse me but why are you snapping at me? I'm just trying to have a simple conversation, why the attitude?" He said in that calm parent voice that just drove me insane.

"Because we have already discussed this a million times and you keep pounding it into my brain day after day! I get it dad! I am not stupid, you just want to rip my life away from me!" My voice rose as I let out a small shred of what I've been feeling lately. "Because that's all you live for! Just take me away from everything I love!"

"Like what?" he was still using the parenting voice, but the tick in his jaw told me other wise.

"Oh I don't know my childhood home; and what about all my friends?" I was standing now and almost yelling.

"Well if I recall you said you don't have any friends." He cracked his jaw as it ticked again.

"I have more friends than you have whores and I'll tell you what, dad." I spat the title, "That's pretty impressive."

He stood up and pointed a finger at me as his face turned red, "You better watch your mouth, young lady!"

"Yeah? Well you better watch you're back!" I screamed and ran out the door, I didn't even stop to close the back door as I ran away from him.