The Faith Journey: A Devotional

The Beginning of My Faith Journey

The following is the project I had to write for confirmation at my church. We had just moved there, but moving there changed my life. God changed my life entirely!

I had to present this to my confirmation class, and I cried reading it - but only because God changed my life. Because of his wondrous plan, I was free.

The Beginning of My Faith Journey:

I'm sure you've heard the saying, "God works in mysterious ways." Just this past year, I've found out how true that phrase is. I left the church I've been at my whole life, and left some of my dearest friends back there, yet coming to this church was a blessing in disguise.

At the time when we were leaving the old church, I didn't think any good could come of it. I doubted God and I was so confused and conflicted. A lot of my doubt was because of leaving, but some of it was from the discussions I'd tried to have with my pastor.

One time, I had wanted to ask my pastor a question during class, and he told me to wait until after class. So then I talked to him personally after class, and he discussed my question with me. It was a certain belief I have, and most wouldn't agree with my belief, which is okay. I didn't want him to agree, I just wanted him to listen to me, and he didn't. After that, I felt shut out and so lost. Talking to my pastor only made things worse. He just told me how wrong I was, before even listening to me. I was very upset afterwards, and it all pretty much went downhill from there at the old church.

I actually thought I had started all the trouble at the church. I thought I was the reason everyone was angry and disagreeing. It was sickening. Thankfully, I soon talked with my parents and realized I hadn't caused everyone to get angry. What I hadn't realized is that things had been going wrong for a long time, and for a lot of different people. I just hadn't known, until then, how wrong things were. It was still a very tough decision to leave, for everyone, but I can honestly say we tried everything to make things better. We held meetings, tried talking, but nothing worked. After unsuccessful change, we went in search of a new church home.

I was still very confused about the whole situation, and very scared. St. Paul was the only church I'd ever known. I grew up there, I was baptized there, and I took confirmation classes there. I learned all about God and Jesus in that place, with all those people. It was my home.

The worst part of leaving wasn't the church, but the people I left behind. My best friend still attends that church, and I love her so much. But now we no longer talk. I haven't seen her in months, and most of the attempts I've made to contact her haven't worked. So, I did doubt God at the time, because I didn't realize what he had in store for me. God blessed us with all these amazing people, pastors, and a new home. A better home. He worked in a mysterious way, but the plan he had for all of us was wonderful.

What I hadn't realized is that He always has a plan. Everyone sometimes forgets that they're in His hands. In times like that, I always think back to my favorite hymn, "Eagle's Wings." The lyrics are dear to me. It starts with "And God will raise you up on eagle's wings." Then the last words are "and hold you in the palm of His hand." I always hum it or sing the song if I'm doubting or sad, because the words say it all.

I am in the palm of His hands. I am in His hands, and he won't let me fall. He has a plan, and always does.

Now, I know His plan was to bring us here, and after everything, it was the greatest plan I could have ever prayed for.

One of the other times God has been working in my life is similar to the last. He brought me closer to Him in bringing us here. I hadn't even realized how far away from God I'd been.