Torn (GXG)

Chapter 9

Chapter 9

Charlie's POV

My eyes flicked open painfully. I am never drinking again. I thought as I shifted myself up. My head was starting to pound, the nausea kicked in as soon as I moved and my tongue felt like it was covered in fur. Frowning I looked around and tried to figure out why I was on my sofa and not in my bed. Groaning, I pushed off the blanket I must have pulled off the back of the sofa sometime the night before. Smiling I leaned my head back and laughed a little remembering how Kath had fallen asleep, and how Gem...

"Fuck." I breathed and stood up, feeling suddenly queasier I sat down with my head in my hands. "Oh Fuck." I rubbed my eyes, the memory of last night crashing into me. Gem sat next to me, the way she looked, the crazy urge I had to kiss her. Actually kissing her. God no, worse then that I told her to kiss me, it made me look desperate. I sighed and let out a small scream. "What the fuck do I do now?" I muttered rhetorically to the room as I stood slower then before and ambled to the kitchen for water. My first thought was to call my brother, he always helped me go through guy problems when we were younger and while we lived together. But the sudden realisation that this was in fact a girl problem. How could I come out to Lewis when I didn't even know what this was? Was I gay? Bi? Curious? Or did my feelings only relate to Gem? There were too many questions running through my head, added to the feeling of being hungover, I had no idea how to process this entire situation. In a way I wished he still lived here with me. When I first moved out I lived in a little flat alone but I couldn't hack it for long, I hated the loneliness of being in the flat by myself. While I was half way to saving for a deposit Lewis had mentioned he had wanted to get out from our parents' house but didn't want to pay a stranger rent so in the end when I managed to finally buy myself a little three bed house Lewis had moved in with me. It had been like when we were kids. Our father had been a squadron leader in the air force and we had moved around a lot when we were young so had become each other's best friends. With only ten months between us many people had believed us twins especially with our similar looks. Lewis would get it. I thought chewing my lip, a habit I had when nervous. But would he? I missed mine and Lewis' late night chats with a tub of ice cream between us, maybe he could help me now. Finishing the glass of water I was nursing whilst my inner turmoil raged, I hunted down my phone. It had been abandoned on my coffee table, opening my contacts I scrolled through and hovered over Lewis name.

The memory of our last conversation flashed through my mind. We had had a pretty big argument last week and hadn't spoken since. Perhaps not. Sighing, I was back to panic. What do I do? The question spun around my mind like a hurricane destroying and good feelings I previously had. Having argued with Lewis about his girlfriend last week and the memory of him telling me he wouldn't talk to me until I stopped being an asshole he was out. Who would I even talk to about this, who would even understand the crazy that I was feeling right now? "Ughh." Rubbing my face I sat down again, back on the sofa where I couldn't help but relive last night's events. Gem's soft lips, the feeling of her weight pushing me back onto the sofa, my fantasy started to run wild as I imagined what could have happened if she hadn't asked her housemate to collect her. Her hands running down my sides sliding my t-shirt off, pulling down my bra, warm wet lips encasing a nipple.

"Fuck." I sat up and groaned I couldn't do this. Where had that even come from? Angry at myself I stormed up to the bathroom and stepped into the shower, feeling raw from my runaway thoughts.

By the time was up and dressed and staring at the clock on my bedside table, contemplating the kiss, it had hit half eleven. Sliding my gaze to the photo that sat next to it I hated myself more. Of course I had someone who would understand what was happening to me, two people who were very close in fact. Cursing that I had managed to forget about my best friend, I grabbed a bag and flew from the house to my car, to inflict my company upon Jenn and Lexi.