After I Kill Myself

Chapter Five

I watched my mom taking every piece of origami structures I folded, staring at them until they all turn darker and crumpled because of her silent tears.

I followed my dad who took the piece of apology letter I wrote to them before I left the house to the lake. He read them aloud before folding it to my favorite origami structure - the boat - and sent them into the water. I sat by the lake with him. Watching water from around the paper boat entering it. I watch the boat slowly sinking in, just like how I did.

I walked home with my dad. I could hear him mutter words under every breath he takes, " Cara, how do I tell your grandma about this tragic event of her favorite granddaughter? How do I tell your teachers in school about it while fighting against the tears that will roll down my face? How do I contact your best friend and tell her how her favorite friend on earth has just ended her life while making sure she doesn't feel burdened for not protecting you enough in school? "

Apologetic. All that I felt was apologetic. I never knew my disappearance would be that much of an impact to them.