The Simple use of Grammar

Description Help!

As a reader I want to be shown not told what I'm supposed to be looking at. Just to make sure you know what I mean let me show you some examples.

1. Tell: There was a car. It was black. It had messed up paint. It was in the driveway with blood on it.

2. Show: There was a black Mercedes in the driveway, the left side had a scrape along its paint. Its silver trim was partially missing as if it had recently been in an accident. The silver grill had traces of wood chips and blood smeared across it.

Tell is what authors, especially inexperienced authors, usually use when describing things. It doesn't tell you anything about the car, or who might be driving it. Or anything about what happened. THIS IS THE WRONG WAY!

DO NOT TELL ME ABOUT THE CAR. Show me.

Showing someone a scene is far more difficult, it takes the author knowing the scene before the reader. THIS IS IMPORTANT. Showing someone a scene adds more depth and value to your work.

SHOW ME.

Details on Characters:

Your character is not sexy. HOLD ON! If you want a dramatic, action packed, muscled male character in your story, great! But please, don't demean him into just one word.

SEXY DOESN'T COVER IT!

You have to give us more detail, what color is his hair? Does he have stains on his shirt? Does he always wear stunningly unattractive polos?

If you are describing a female character, do not describe her as sexy. Again, this will not help your character. She won't appear anymore sexy than the screen/paper you're reading this on. This is simply because, we don't know what she looks like!

- Exercises to Improve -

Pick a random object and describe it. The couch, your sleeping grandparents, your dog, or just a picture off the internet. Truth is it doesn't really matter. Just pick something and describe it for at least a page without mentioning what it is. Then read it aloud to someone else, or have them read it and guess what you're describing.

**Comment below if you have questions**