Dear God, Its Me Janie

Meet Micheal

"Janie dear, could you please go to the store to get food for dinner tonight, oh and here's the list and the money to pay for it" my Mom yells to me up the stairs.

Damn, I was happily trying to finish up this paper I had to do for my drama class about Shakespeare and how his repetitive writing affected the readers but no, somebody's just too freaking lazy to get up and do it by themself.

"Okay Mom" I respond to my mom, I put on one of Luke's sweat shirts and head downstairs to get the keys.

"Hey Mom, where's Dad at?" I asked my mother "Oh child, you know your father is always at that church, he's probably already getting ready for church tomorrow" she says.

My father Pastor Christopher Johnson, preaches at 'New Life & Hope Church' and is always talking about fasting and praying and other shit I don't really wanna hear. Unfortunately for us not so godly people ( Me and Luke ) we have to listen to some really stupid stuff.

Like my for my 10th birthday my Mom embarrassed the blue outta me. If somebody asked her how she was doing she would respond with "I'm blessed and highly favored" and then that person would walk off awkwardly with my Mom still smiling like a maniac.

As I walk out the door I hear my phone make a 'Ding'noise. I pull out my iPhone 6 and see that Luke has just texted me.

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Luke: Where r u at ?

Me : Headed to Wal-Mart ,why? And where are you at oh wonderful brother ?

Luke : Just wondering , jeez and why r u so suddenly concerned about me. As I recall yesterday you called me an asshole and told me to jump off a cliff. I'm trying to get the picture here.

Me: I only said that because you went through my underwear drawer

Luke: Mhm

Me: Shut up fool and go HOME

Luke: Fine

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I put my iPhone in my pocket and head to the bus stop. Next year is my senior year and I hope that my parents will buy me a new 2016 Ford Explorer as a graduation gift so I won't have to take the bus anymore. I'm probably setting my expectations way to high, but hey you can only hope.

When the bus finally arrives and I get on I feel very uncomfortable. Here are the three reasons I hate buses and the people on them.

3. It always stinks like somebody just peed on themselves and said to themselves this morning "You know what I don't think I'll put on any deodorant today".

2. It's always too freaking cramped because like if you turn around somebody's arm is right there so basically you run smack into the person who decided they weren't going to put any deodorant on today. Yay

1. People are always doing something nasty like digging in their nose or touching their girlfriends boob or something it's so annoying and rude that I just wanna punch the person who made buses.

Great now I have to find a seat on this stupid stanky bus,( I used alliteration, my teacher is always talking about how I don't use it was enough; ha ha screw you Mrs. Washington) anyway I'll just sit like a little princess and wait for this wonderful chariot of love to arrive at my destination.

When the bus finally arrives at my destination which is Wal-Mart I'm bone tired from sitting in that not so comfortable chair. I walk inside Wal-Mart and grab a cart wondering just what do I have to buy in here.

As I walk into the store I notice the list my Mom gave me. Hmm ........ it doesn't seem too long just five items , God I hope I don't run into