18th December
1am
I haven't written for a while, I have had things on my mind. Like her and us. I went back into her shop yesterday and asked her her name so we could be introduced properly. She's called Enne it's literally pronounced 'N'. And it's the most fucking beautiful name ever. I'm crazy about her. Yet I hardly know her. I have only seen her face a few times, but she is always on my mind. She is always there. How can I get rid of her? And now that I'm thinking about her and writing about her again. I crave her. It cheesy but our hands touched for a little longer than usual when she gave me my change back for my lunch. I felt something I have never felt before. It was magnetic, new and exciting. I still can't sleep well. I guess it's hard after 5 years of always having to be somewhere and being with other people in now free and alone. It's sad.
IRL this afternoon
The rain fell on me as I walked through the quiet street. And although it was quiet I still got asked for about 20 pictures. And about 8 of them asked for my phone number. Obviously I don't give it out to fans, it would spread like wild fire. Although I love being in the band in miss having a private life. I miss being able just to pop to the shops without being mobbed.
(This is short and crappy. I'm not feeling great at the moment sorry)
